8. Mozzarella sticks will actually make you happy. | The Odyssey Online
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10 Reasons Mozzarella Sticks Are Better Than Being ~Strung~ Along By Some Boy

Mozzarella sticks are better in every conceivable way.

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10 Reasons Mozzarella Sticks Are Better Than Being ~Strung~ Along By Some Boy
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In This Article:

I know what you're thinking--how lonely does this girl have to be to write a whole article about her undying love for mozzarella sticks and how they're just ~that~ much better than boys?

The answer: Very, but you clicked on this, so I assuming we're all in the same boat here, so let's just cut to the chase on why mozzarella sticks are better than boys for these 10 reasons.

1. Mozzarella sticks won't break your achy breaky heart.

If anything, they'll fill it with love and joy, and if your heart is broken, mozzarella sticks will put the pieces back together.

2. They're filled with cheese.

Granted, boys can be cheesy, too, but wouldn't you rather have ACTUAL cheese than having to hear some dude's corny joke?

3. Mozzarella sticks aren't passive aggressive. 

In fact, you won't ever hear a word out of them.

4. Mozzarella sticks won't cheat on you.

They only have eyes for you.

5. They'll listen to you if you've had a bad day.

They'll make your bad day into a good one!

6. They don't lie to you about where they've been.

Unless you take them out of your freezer, they're staying in your freezer.

7. Mozzarella sticks love your family, and your family loves mozzarella sticks.

Girls always worry about whether her family will like her boyfriend, but you don't have to worry about that with mozzarella sticks because 10 out of 10 times your family will love your mozzarella sticks.

8. Mozzarella sticks will actually make you happy.

Can mozzarella sticks make you cry? Answer: Only if it's out of happiness and they're tears of joy.

9. They won't argue with you.

Because they're mozzarella sticks, and they really just don't care.

10. You'll never find a boy who is better looking than a mozzarella stick.

I mean HONESTLY just look at that. That's all you really need in life, right there.

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