5 Signs You’re The ‘Mother Teresa Friend’ Of The Friend Group

5 Signs You’re The ‘Mother Teresa Friend’ Of The Friend Group

Having a heart for service is so difficult, but it's you're calling.
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Most people think that people who volunteer often and enjoy community service are doing it for the attention, scholarships, and overall boost in self-image. That may be true for a really small percentage of volunteers, but what about the rest of us? I’m talking about the people who are literally designed for the service of others, who genuinely set out to live their lives for other people.

Yes, we exist, and it’s nothing like you would think.

1. It’s a spiritual gift, an actual part of your personality.

In the Bible, it’s stated several times that each person has a special talent, a gift that they are given to help and better the lives of others (Romans 12:4-8, I Corinthians 12:8-10, I Peter 4:11). It’s not something that develops overnight; this kind of zeal for helping others is part of your character. You don’t do service because your parents/friends/teachers said you have to. It makes you truly happy to see other people benefit from betterment in their lives.

2. You can’t sit around and watch other people work.

It’s like an itch that can’t be satisfied. You can’t seem to be able to say no to anyone who asks you to help them with a project, and you’re usually the only one excited when a friend or neighbor asks for volunteers to help them with something. Even if it’s mundane, boring work, you still enjoy it and can’t imagine spending your time anywhere else. You have the mindset that it needs to be done, therefore someone will benefit from it!

3. People tend to shame you.

Often labeled as a try-hard, a “goodie two shoes”, a saint, et cetera, it becomes really hard to admit that your passion is in helping others. Most people expect you to do volunteer work for the attention and the praise, because we live in an age of instant gratification. Especially with long-term projects, it’s hard for a lot of people to understand that the rewards aren’t seen right away... or at all. It’s easy to let all the negativity get in your way, but just remember that most of society doesn’t see life through service-tinted glasses, the way you do.

4. Most of the time, your service is unnoticed or unappreciated.

Lots of people with a heart for service are the behind-the-scenes operators of life, the ones pushing from behind to make others’ lives great. It’s a thankless job, but you still find a passion in it. You don’t have to have a parade in your honor or even a pat on the back to know that you helped someone. You’re fulfilled by the actual act itself, not what anyone else thinks about your work. It makes you happy to see change happening, and ultimately, that’s what service is all about to you.

5. But at the end of the day, it’s all worth it.

Though it may sometimes be misunderstood, having a heart for service is actually kind of amazing. Seeing little acts transform into blessings for other people is truly a wonderful thing. It’s one of the best feelings in the world to be able to help someone in need, even if it’s only in a small way. So don’t be afraid to admit that you have a heart for service! Everyone needs a little of your selfless passion in their lives.

Cover Image Credit: Defense Archives

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22 New Things That I Want To Try Now That I'm 22

A bucket list for my 22nd year.

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"I don't know about you but I'm feelin' 22," I have waited 6 long years to sing that and actually be 22! Now 22 doesn't seem like a big deal to people because you can't do anything that you couldn't do before and you're still super young. But I'm determined to make my 22nd year a year filled with new adventures and new experiences. So here's to 22.

1. Go sky diving.

What's crazier than jumping out of a plane? (Although I'll probably try indoor skydiving first.)

2. Go cliff jumping/diving.

I must be the only Rhode Islander who hasn't gone to Jamestown and jumped off a cliff.

3. Ride in a hor air balloon.

Up, up and away.

4. Try out skiing.

Cash me in the next Olympics, how bout dat.

5. Try out snow boarding.

Shawn White, I'm coming for you.

6. Go bungee jumping.

Because at least this time I'll be attached to something.

7. Go to Portugal.

I mean I'm Portuguese so I have to go at some point, right?

8. Go to Cape Verde.

Once again, I'm Cape Verdean so I have to go.

9. Vist one of the seven wonders of the world.

I mean hey, Egypt's on, my bucket list.

10. Try out surfing.

It's only natural that somebody from the Ocean State knows how to surf.

11. Learn a new langauge.

Because my little bit of Portuguese, Spanish and Latin isn't cutting it anymore.

12. Travel to a state that I've never been to before.

Fun fact: I've only been to 17 of the 50 states.

13. Go paddle boarding.

Pretty boring but I've never done it.

14. Go scuba diving.

I'm from the Ocean State so I guess I should see the ocean up close and personal.

15. Learn how to line dance.

There's actually a barn in my state that does line dancing, so this one will definitely get crossed off.

16. Go kayaking.

All this water around me and I haven't done a lot of the water activites.

17. Stay the night in a haunted hotel room.

I bet if I got my friends to come with me, it would be like the Suite Life of Zach and Cody episode, minus the ghost coming out of the wall but you never know.

18. Get my palms read.

Because who doesn't want to know their future.

19. Go to a medium.

Like a medium that can communicate with people that have died.

20. Take a helicopter ride.

Air plane: check Helicopter:....

21. Sleep under the stars.

Because sleeping in a tent is more like glamping than camping

22. Just to try new things in my everyday life.

Whether it's trying a new restaurant, getting something different at my usual restaurants, changing my usual style, going on the scary rides at amusement parks, and bringing things I used to do back into my life now.

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I've Lived On Both The West Coast And The East Coast, But I'm Still Not Sure I can Choose Between the Two

I just can't choose between New York and California.

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I grew up in San Jose, California in my perfect little suburbia. I lived in the same neighborhood for over ten years, had the same neighbors, same friends. The leaves turned orange and red every fall, every street glowed with festive lights during Christmas time, and during the summers I would drive down to Santa Cruz with my friends and try to find all the hidden beaches along the coast. I felt like I belonged there because it's home, and everything is familiar at home. But moving to New York for college was the most exciting and challenging endeavor I'd ever taken on. I learned that there were countless other cultures and quirks that San Jose just can't compare to.

Transitioning from California to New York wasn't that difficult. One of the reasons I chose to study at St. John's is because of its location. Queens is one of the five boroughs of New York City but is more relaxed compared to the hustle and bustle of Manhattan. Queens is its own little suburbia, just like the area I grew up in. Except instead of green lawns, white picket fences, people riding longboards, and Philz Coffee, there are crooked sidewalks, chrome railings, delivery men on motorized bikes, and Dunkin Donuts.

I would consider myself a very laid back person, and I've met so many people who tell me, "Oh I can tell you're from California." Apparently, non-Californians see people from the west coast as super chill and friendly people. New York, however, has a bad reputation for having incredibly rude people. This, I can attest to, although not wholeheartedly. People in New York aren't rude or mean per se; they just mind their business and only their business. If you were to walk your dog through my neighborhood in San Jose, at least three people will stop and say hi and ask how your day is. If you walk anywhere in New York, maybe three people will even make eye contact with you. This probably has something to do with the fast-paced culture of the city.

If you've ever been to New York, you know that their natural walking pace is equivalent to an average person's steady jog. Everything they do is non-stop. Walking too slow on the sidewalk? Have to swipe your MetroCard more than once, therefore getting stuck in the turnstile, therefore getting in everyone's way? Taking up too much space on the train? Now you got off the train and don't know which way to walk? Too bad, because you better keep moving! Three years in, and I'm still learning how to keep up.

Another challenge as a Californian on the east coast is having to survive actual seasons throughout the year. The first time it snowed during my first winter in New York, I was amazed. I mean, I had seen snow before, but now I was actually living in it! After the first snow, though, it was all downhill. I was just cold, wet, and sad. In San Jose, on any given day, it's probably sunny and 70 degrees. Sunny and 70 degrees. Do you understand what it feels like to live 18 years in the California sunshine just to move to a place that's cloudy and snowy for three months out of the year? Hell. It feels like hell, but frozen over.

My biggest, most problematic obstacle in New York City is public transportation. I am not used to taking buses and trains anywhere. Back home, I drove everywhere. That includes everything from the five-minute drive to my high school that was literally down the street (I could've just walked) to the thirty-minute drive to my friend's house on the other side of San Jose. I was so used to traveling in the comfort of my own car that riding the train felt like being trapped in other people's breathing air. The subway still makes me feel grimy and claustrophobic at times, but I've come to enjoy blasting my music in my headphones and being able to get work done while commuting.

The concentration of diverse cultures is incredible in New York. Where I grew up, although very liberal, most people are white, Asian, or Mexican. In New York, people identify with so many more races and ethnicities, and I love how all of these cultures are reflected through their various cuisine. I'm a big foodie, so these things are important to me. San Jose has just as many different cuisines - a quality I appreciate, knowing that parts of New York resemble home.

As someone who grew up in the Bay Area and has also experienced living in New York City, I really can't choose which coast I like better. San Jose is home, but Queens is starting to grow roots in my heart, too.

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