From my perspective, it still feels like I am a teenager. It still feels like my peers and I are being blamed by the adults for things we didn’t do. I still feel like I am figuring out what I want to do for a living even though I have finished my first year of college. And even as my friends and I grow older, I can’t bring myself to view them (or myself) as the adults that we are becoming.

The people that I work with, however, don’t see me as anything beyond the nineteen-year-old that is about to start the rest of her life. As a result, I hear things such as “soon you’ll be married and starting a family” and “just wait, in six years you’ll have a kid and everything will be different” while discussing my future as a doctor with my colleagues. And when I scrunch my nose or try to tell them how I feel about the picture they have painted for my life, they assure me I am wrong.

The funny thing is, the more I look around, the more I have found that my friends (particularly females) have some pretty strong stances on adult issues. They are gradually becoming less and less interested in starting a family. As a kid, I always thought the urge to start a family would grow along with me but I and many others have found that it sometimes doesn’t. So, I am here to explain our multiple perspectives to all you future-painters on behalf of the women that feel the same as me.

This article is for anyone that doesn’t want children or plans to adopt and wants people to understand why.

If you research it, women around the industrialized world are typically having children in their late twenties, even early thirties. This is because we, as a gender, we're finding our role in society beyond being mothers. But things are a bit different when you’re a part of my generation:

Many of us can agree that the world has lost some of its luster. And, oftentimes, the younger generation is blamed for issues that originate long before we were born. For some, raising a child in the world that we currently live in is an undesirable thought. Budding conflicts and climate change are some of the many issues that future generations are going to struggle with and be blamed for if they, like us, haven’t solved an issue that will take generations in a matter of months. (News flash: it’s because most of you are too busy trying to deny its existence).

My generation, though brilliant, is also the most underpaid. Most of us can’t afford to put a roof over our own heads, yet along a child’s as well. For that reason, the fear of not being able to provide for children or raise them as well as we were raised is another contributing factor. A similar issue arises for those that want to focus on travel with limited funds. And, like money, time is something that many of us don’t have much of.

With demanding jobs, many of us feel that we are forced to choose between our career or a child. And when it comes to professional careers that most of us have spent upwards of 25 years being educated for, it may take priority. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be present in your child’s life and realizing that you wouldn’t be able to be.

If you’re like me, you’re thinking about all the children that are living without families due to abandonment or being orphans. I think it’s more important to care for those that are already here and in need before we start having our own children (but this is an issue that I will likely dedicate an entire article to).

On the bright side, the popularity of dogs is at an all-time high so I predict that we’ll see a rise in dog adoptions with the decrease in birth rates. After all, dogs are much easier to take care of and they put fewer things in their mouths.

So, to the next adult that I discuss my professional future with: either ask me about my personal goals or, (and this is a pretty crazy request) just don’t bring it up and actually discuss my professional future.