How Millennials Can Prepare For Future Success

If You're Not Investing In Your Future, What Are You Investing In?

Your friends don't create your future, so why base every move around them?

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Things have been put in perspective for me recently. With a year left in my college career, it's incredibly overwhelming to think about where I will be in a year. As a college student, you always have people giving you contradictory advice. Hell, the reason we go to college is to create a future for ourselves. However, when you get into college, people always tell you "live in the moment, man."

What the hell does this mean? Live in the moment? It's kind of impossible not to. I'm kidding of course, but when people say live in the moment this usually insinuates that you shouldn't be obsessed with the little things that plague your free time. Things like stressing about finding an internship, worrying about your test grades, and the various other habits of students are probably things that these "live in the moment" people are talking about.

This is fine and dandy. I completely agree now, in hindsight, that the stress I've caused myself worrying about a grade that does not reflect my capability as a student was not worth it. But far too often, these "live in the moment" people mistake meticulousness for being absent-minded in the present. Concerning yourself with your future can bring you down two roads (bear with me here).

There is the first road, the road that those "live in the moment" people warn you about. For example, skipping on going out with friends because you're worried that giving up two hours of your time is going to ruin your grades. The way those in-the-moment people see it, if you actually prepared for the future like you say you do, you would already be prepared for the test instead of studying last minute.

These people are right — if you remove yourself from the moment because you are constantly stressing out and scrambling to get your shit together, sorry, you're not a futuristic thinker.

Then there's the second road, the holy grail of now and then. Planning every move that you do now to be worth your time, whether that's an investment in yourself now or in the future. To counteract those "live in the moment" people, no, every minute of our time doesn't have to be absent from the moment. Living with your future in mind means shifting your perspective from an "Oh man I'm just living day-to-day and taking life as it comes, bro" to "every single day I wake up is an opportunity to make the "me" 10 years from now a very happy person."

I feel that a lot of college students are where I am right now, struggling with a year left in this little bubble that we have immersed ourselves in to find our sense of identity in the real world. College sucks in that way, especially where I am because it is so far removed from the ebb and flow of the real world. It's hard to plan for your future and invest in yourself when the other 99% of people are studying and working for the weekend.

You get to this point, hopefully, where you realize you should NEVER base what you are going to do for the day based around what your friends are doing. If you plan to even have a future, you must realize that your friends in the moment are not going to create that future for you. So, why plan your every move around what THEY are doing? Changing your mindset with this in mind is living for the future.

It's 2018 and the world is constantly changing; this not a cliche, this is the truth. If your moves aren't strategic, get ready to fall behind.

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Working With People Who Are Dying Teaches You So Much About How To Live

Spending time with hospice patients taught me about the art of dying.

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Death is a difficult subject.

It is addressed differently across cultures, lifestyles, and religions, and it can be difficult to find the right words to say when in the company of someone who is dying. I have spent a lot of time working with hospice patients, and I bore witness to the varying degrees of memory loss and cognitive decline that accompany aging and disease.

The patients I worked with had diverse stories and interests, and although we might have had some trouble understanding each other, we found ways to communicate that transcended any typical conversation.

I especially learned a lot from patients severely affected by dementia.

They spoke in riddles, but their emotions were clearly communicated through their facial expressions and general demeanor, which told a story all on their own.

We would connect through smiles and short phrases, yes or no questions, but more often than not, their minds were in another place. Some patients would repeat the details of the same event, over and over, with varying levels of detail each time.

Others would revert to a child-like state, wondering about their parents, about school, and about family and friends they hadn't seen in a long time.

I often wondered why their minds chose to wander to a certain event or time period and leave them stranded there before the end of their life. Was an emotionally salient event reinforcing itself in their memories?

Was their subconscious trying to reconnect with people from their past? All I could do was agree and follow their lead because the last thing I wanted to do was break their pleasant memory.

I felt honored to be able to spend time with them, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was intruding on their final moments, moments that might be better spent with family and loved ones. I didn't know them in their life, so I wondered how they benefited from my presence in their death.

However, after learning that several of the patients I visited didn't have anyone to come to see them, I began to cherish every moment spent, whether it was in laughter or in tears. Several of the patients never remembered me. Each week, I was a new person, and each week they had a different variation of the same story that they needed to tell me.

In a way, it might have made it easier to start fresh every week rather than to grow attached to a person they would soon leave.

Usually, the stories were light-hearted.

They were reliving a memory or experiencing life again as if it were the first time, but as the end draws nearer, a drastic shift in mood and demeanor is evident.

A patient who was once friendly and jolly can quickly become quiet, reflective, and despondent. I've seen patients break down and cry, not because of their current situation, but because they were mourning old ones. These times taught me a lot about how to be just what that person needs towards the end of their life.

I didn't need to understand why they were upset or what they wanted to say.

The somber tone and tired eyes let me know that what they had to say was important and worth hearing. What mattered most is that someone who cared was there to hear it.

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I'm Focused On My Career Life, Not My Love Life And I Don't Feel Like I'm Missing Out

You don't need a significant other for your life to feel significant.

tiannat
tiannat
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I'm an independent girl. I have always had big dreams and I will do anything to reach those dreams. I have worked 20-40 hours a week since I was 15 years old. I have a great group of friends, filled with amazing women and wonderful men. I'm active in my social life and I'm always down for the newest adventure. I would say that my life is very rounded out. However, sometimes when I'm surrounded by my peers, I see that most of them are in some form of relationship. This, however, is an aspect of my life that is currently open for applicants.

Being almost 20 years old, I have friends in all different walks of the dating game. Some are in new and exciting relationships while others are getting prepared for marriage. Hearing the talks of future plans, significant others are a major part of my friends' futures. Not saying that I don't want to date, because I do, but I simply don't have time for it right now.

I would rather be looking for internships than swiping through Tinder. I would rather be building my portfolio than breaking down my walls. I would rather be adding experience to my resume than adding another guy into my life.

And, to be honest, I really hate this generation of dating. From the late night texts to the ghosting, I just hate it. I know a lot of people say this now, but I just don't want a relationship based around technology. I want something that is authentic, honest and real. I don't want to go on dates with guys from a dating app, knowing what their true intention is. I don't want to meet a random guy at a frat party (who probably isn't that good for me). I don't want to Netflix and chill.

Like my career, I want something I can learn from. I want someone I can learn from. I want someone that will help me towards my goals, rather than distracting me from them. I want someone who is as focused on their careers as I am. And frankly, I don't think this is a bad thing.

So, while some girls are planning their wedding days or their future kids' names, I am planning the details to creating my own business and how I'm going to get there. I'm proud that I know where I want to be in my career. Sure, I don't have a boyfriend or any romantic future plans, but that shouldn't make me feel less than.

If you're work driven, please be proud of that! You don't need a significant other for your life to feel significant. Get that promotion, start that business, grow your work experience. Your love life will follow and it will feel so much sweeter when it does come. Be excited for your friends and their love lives, but be excited for what's to come for you too. If you're passionate about something, it doesn't have to feel like you're missing out.

tiannat
tiannat

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