Millennial Lives Aren't As Perfect As They Look

Millennial Lives Aren't As Perfect As They Look

Jealousy is that green eyes monster you see in my eyes, reflecting back at your own demons.

Have you ever looked at someone and wished you had what they had?

That you looked the way they looked?

Were you ever so jealous of someone it twisted your heart into something ugly?

Twisted you into someone ugly?

I have. I'll be the first one to say I get jealous. I think it's a personality trait. I'm an extremely jealous and territorial person, but I learned to control it.

Why did I learn to tone it down and control it?

Because I was the victim of someone's jealousy.

Ugly to me, isn't a physical thing. Instead, it's something that lives inside people. It's that darkness that clouds your mind and the anger that burns your soul black.

It's a choice you make when you go out of your way to hurt someone out of spite and jealousy. That makes you ugly, not your physical appearance.

Jealousy makes people ugly. It's one of the few things I believe can make someone truly ugly. I believe that everyone is beautiful, in one way or another, until they start twisting themselves into being jealous, cruel people.

I saw myself becoming that. It was not good. I didn't want to be ugly like that. Instead, I changed my outlook.

People can come back from being ugly. There is a line, though. If you cross it, you may be stuck being a twisted version of yourself. The version of yourself that hides the brightness and light that lives inside you. The darkness can easily over take the light if you let it.

A sign you're becoming ugly is when you look in the mirror and can't recognize yourself because you have that look in your eyes. The look of anger and hate. You can't hide it, no matter how hard you try. People can see it. I can see it. And if they can't see it, people can sense it.

I'm not even saying that someone being jealous is the only cause of being ugly.

Other people can cause it too.

Once you are hurt or begin to mistrust someone, the darkness finds a crack to slip inside. Another person is almost always the catalyst. But from there, it's your choice to let that darkness reside in you or for you to exorcize it out.

Jealousy is the main cause of the darkness I found myself in. As I mentioned before, I have been at the other end of someone's jealousy and It wasn't pretty. Though it sucked, it showed me the flaws in my own self and how I didn't want to end up.

You can be jealous because I'm skinny, despite eating so very unhealthily.

Never mind the fact that I work out and dance constantly, worrying if I gain one pound I won't be as alluring as everyone says I am, due to my size.

You can be jealous I'm young and have my whole life ahead of me.

You're jealous I have the opportunities you didn't have or didn't take advantage of. Despite me working my ass off for everything I have, and overcoming more than you can even imagine.

You're jealous that I'm so successful at the age of 22, and the only place I have to go is up.

I'm editor-in-chief of Odyssey at Ursinus and your jealousy won't shame me. I'm damn proud of all I have done.

You're jealous that I'm smart and clever. Sometimes intelligence is not a gift. I don't work to have a 3.9 GPA, even though I go to a challenging private school, but know that I'm bored out of my mind. I wish I had to study like all of my friends because then I'd have friends to hang out with.

And finally, you can be jealous of my relationships because people are attracted to me. I always joke and say it's my face. I just have a friendly face, that people feel safe confiding in me. But know, after being labeled the mom of the group, I have no one to confide in and have to hold everything inside. Just know, my relationships aren't as perfect as they seem.

So you see, maybe the things you are jealous of have their down sides. Maybe you should appreciate what you have and cut out the things that are turning you ugly with jealousy. Maybe you should stop looking at my life, comparing it to yours. Maybe you should just be happy with all that you have.

Jealousy is that green eyes monster you see in my eyes, reflecting back at your own demons. It's the monster that whispers sweet evils into your ear. It's the monster that can take you over the line and you won't ever come back.

So you better watch your back, because those monsters slip through even the smallest of cracks.

Everyone feels jealousy but if you let it control you, it'll twist you into something you aren't.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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44 Lyrics For When You Need An Instagram Caption

Your caption is just as important as the filter.

Choosing the caption for your Instagram can be almost as challenging as deciding on a filter. So, if you’re ready to post that Insta, but don’t know what to say, here are 44 lyrics for when you need an Instagram caption.

1. “Be young, be dope, be proud.” - Lana Del Rey, "American"

2. “I can’t really see another squad tryna cross us.” - Drake, "No Tellin’"

3. “Darling I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” - Taylor Swift, "Blank Space"

4. “I’m throwin' shade like it’s sunny.” - Nicki Minaj, "Want Some More"

5. “I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist.” - Sia, "Chandelier"

6. “Find me where the wild things are.” - Alessia Cara, "Wild Things"

7. “If I was you, I'd wanna be me too.” - Meghan Trainor, "Me Too"

8. “Sweet like candy to my soul, sweet you rock and sweet you roll.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Crash Into Me"

9. “I swear this life is like the sweetest thing I’ve ever known.” - Drake, "Over"

10. “I hope you never lose your sense of wonder.” - Lee Ann Womack, "I Hope You Dance"

11. “But if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all? - Bastille, "Pompeii"

12. “You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.” - John Lennon, "Imagine"

13. “You can’t choose what stays and what fades away.” - Florence + The Machine, "No Light, No Light"

14. “She acts like summer and walks like rain.” - Train, "Drops of Jupiter

15. “She’s a good girl, loves her mama. Loves Jesus, and America too.” - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, "Free Fallin’"

16. “Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones.” - Coldplay, "Fix You"

17. “Say you’ll remember me.” - Taylor Swift, "Wildest Dreams"

18. I’ve got thick skin and an elastic heart.” - Sia, "Elastic Heart"

19. “Give me the beat boys and free my soul.” - Uncle Kracker, "Drift Away"

20. “One of these days the clocks will stop, and time won’t mean a thing.” - Foo Fighters, "These Days"

21. “Sunshine mixed with a little hurricane.” - Brad Paisley, Perfect Storm

22. “You are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need.” Zedd feat. The Foxes, "Clarity"

23. “Her mind is Tiffany twisted, she’s got the Mercedes bends.” - The Eagles, "Hotel California"

24. “Life imitates art.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

25. “Nobody said it was easy, no one said it would be this hard.” - Coldplay, "The Scientist"

26. “You’re gonna keep my soul, it was yours to have long ago.” - State Radio, "Keepsake"

27. “Celebrate we will ‘cause life is short but sweet for certain.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Two Step"

28. “It’s always darkest before the dawn.” - Florence + The Machine, "Shake it Out"

29. “There are many things I’d like to say to you but I don’t know how.” - Oasis, "Wonderwall"

30. “You say you want a revolution, well you know we all wanna change the world.” - The Beatles, "Revolution"

31. “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.” Billy Currington, "People Are Crazy"

32. “Well my heart is gold, and my hands are cold.” - Halsey, "Gasoline"

33. “I don’t want to be heard, I want to be listened to.” - Twenty One Pilots, "Forest"

34. “Where you invest your love, you invest your life.” - Mumford and Sons, "Awake My Soul"

35. “I think I need a sunrise, I’m tired of the sunset.” - Augustana, "Boston"

36. “All of these lines across my face tell you the story of who I am.” - Brandi Carlile, "The Story"

37. ‘Ready or not, here I come. Where you at? The night is young.” - Bridgit Mendler, "Ready or Not"

38. “In the land of Gods and Monsters, I was an angel.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

39. “Turns out not where, but who you’re with that really matters.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Best Of What’s Around"

40. “Know yourself, know your worth.” - Drake, "0 to 100"

41. “I’m little but I’m coming for the crown.” - Lorde, "Still Sane"

42. “Didn’t they tell you I was a savage?” - Rihanna, "Needed Me"

43. “Hands in the air like we don’t care.” - Miley Cyrus, "We Can’t Stop"

44. “I’ma keep running because a winner don’t quit on themselves.” - Beyonce, "Freedom"

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In Memory of the Capital gazette five

A tribute to the legacy they left behind.


It's time to say it. Journalism is the most important yet increasingly dangerous occupation.

By now, many of you have heard about the tragic shooting at the Capital Gazette in Annapolis, Maryland. FIrst, may G-d protect and comfort the mourners. Second, why are journalists targets?

It's no secret that in many foreign countries today the media is the first thing governments and power-hungry individuals seek to control, suppress or eliminate upon their usurping of power. Many countries, like Somalia, Rwanda, Turkey and China, force all journalists to publish only state-approved propaganda. What's worse, they'll jail or kill journalists who stand by their convictions and insist on a free press.

I look at the person who gunned down the five Capital Gazette journalists, two of whom I recognized immediately, as less than this. I see him as nothing more than a spoiled coward. He didn't have the decency to let the court ruling in his failed defamation lawsuit stand. He couldn't put on his big boy pants and deal with his own personal demons. Instead, he took out his anger on people who were hired to do one thing: Write stories about people in their community. Which they did, ethically, efficaciously and timely.

It's been around 225 years since journalists have been targets on these shores to the increasing frequency in the first few decades of this century.

During that turbulent colonial period, dozens of brave souls, including the famous Thomas Payne, journalism was a truly dangerous profession. Those courageous men and women put their lives on the line to expose the abuses of the British monarchy and neighboring business owners who exploited fellow colonists. Like any other authoritarian regime, the British Crown then would go to extreme lengths, including hanging journalists for treason for publishing the truth as they saw it.

In this young century, journalists have to fend off not just a narcissistic president who compares them to a great evil. They also battle one another over the most trivial of political trivialities on a daily basis. Print journalists, in particular, have to carry over their heads the specter of a business a great number of experts say is gasping for monetary air.

This horrific attack on respected and honored defenders of print journalism, in addition, resurrects the age-old question of how free should the press be? Where is the dividing line between keeping journalists safe from harm and leaving our society open to scrutiny and debate? What topics, if any, are to be mandated as "off limits" to journalism?

As I reflect back on the articles written by the Captial Gazette team and many other journalists throughout this country, some of whom I have profound disagreements with for their political rhetoric, my answers are simple. Completely free. Eliminate the dividing line. And, none.

That may sound simple but it's not.

Despite the obvious downside of having a press free to investigate and report on literally anything, it is a necessity. The good outweighs the harm. The knowledge and support their information provides their community, our nation, and the world grants us the freedom to check and balance our government in ways not conceived two-and-a-quarter centuries ago.

On the other hand, as journalists, we must be ever conscious that our world has changed. That, like our foreign counterparts, we have domestic enemies who seek to stop us by every mean at their disposal. Including, may G-d save us, murder.

Carrying these ideas forward, we must also recognize that we must leave no stone unturned. Investigate the new Watergate. Espouse our insane political opinion. Use every fact to our selfish advantage. Or, just as bad, ignore every fact to our selfish advantage.

All of the above force our fellow journalists to keep us honest, ethical and efficacious. But above all, it brings honor to those who are unwittingly thrown into that literal line of fire. It forces us, the survivors and the living, to create a legacy built from their memory. In this way, we can move forward, resolute that we have done our real job: Preserving our history as we live it.

This article is dedicated in memory to the courageous Capital Gazette team who fell in the line of their duty of telling the story. May their work be a source of endless information and inspiration.

In memory of:

Robert Hiaasen

Wendi Winters

John McNamara

Rebecca Smith

Gerald Fischman

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