Being The Middle Child Doesn't Mean You're 'Stuck' In The Middle Forever

Being The Middle Child Doesn't Mean You're 'Stuck' In The Middle Forever

Growing up as the middle child prepared me for future success.

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They say that every middle child has a complex. That we feel like we are the most forgotten or how we feel as though no one really pays attention to us. Well, let me tell you one thing as a middle child myself being forgotten about is not a feeling that I avoid often. Growing up I was torn between two worlds. Trying to act like an adult with my older sister or being a rambunctious preteen with my younger brother.

When I was with my brother, I was always told that I was too loud, too crazy, just too much. Yet being around my sister I was looked down upon as the younger of the two and stuck always being not enough. Not mature enough, not working hard enough and not living up to her expectations. All my life I have felt like I was living in a shadow. My presence was always commented on of how I would be the class star because my older sister was amazing at chemistry, or how I must be so proud of myself because my grades were nowhere near the downward level of my brothers (sorry bub).

But through the shadow, I entered college. No one knew who I was and instead of fearing the unfamiliar I relished in the freshness of creating myself over again. Now I didn't go crazy and change my whole personality but day by day I crept out of my shell more and more. I made friends who knew me only as the girl in the Anthro class or the blonde down the hall. I wasn't anyone's sister and past reputations didn't matter to my new friends.

Academically I began to prosper. Taking classes where the professors not only took me seriously, but where they could care less if I had a stellar, or less than, sibling. They took my work and judged me from my edits to my attendance. My eyes were finally opened to the possibilities of being myself and not overshadowed by a previously taught sibling.

At home, my world began to change as well. At the dinner table on Sundays, it wasn't always the same question being asked around it was all three siblings talking about the interesting components that had made up our days. I would rant about the new book I was figuratively dissecting while my sister would talk about how she was literally dissecting organisms. My brother got to cheerfully narrate about his lacrosse practices and not one of our conversations would overlap the others in the context of what we were saying.

I began to become my own person and for the first time in a long time I felt like I was seen, and that I shone brightly in my new environment. Being stuck in the middle and forgotten about as a middle child may have its perks. But becoming an adult and finding confidence in yourself will make the shadow scurry away, illuminated by the brightness of within.

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It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.
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Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

SEE ALSO: 18 Signs You're A Little Too Comfortable With Your Best Friends

The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things You Say To Your Roommates Before Going Out

The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.


Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward

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Beautiful: Nine Letters, Infinite Meanings

Macy's spring 2019 fashion commercial is making a statement by encouraging women to redefine beautiful

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While anxiously waiting for my show to turn back on during a commercial break, one commercial specifically caught my eye. It starting out with a blonde-haired woman, standing proud with a noticeable scar down her nose. As they flip to some clips of a diverse set of women, a power voice begins to speak. The first line immediately took hold of my attention.

"Beautiful, one word that holds the weight of thousands. We collect false promises, contorting ourselves to fit inside those letters"


Find Your Beautiful | Macy's Spring Fashion 2019 www.youtube.com

The commercial captures a diverse set of women as they confidently exemplify their own beauty in a day to day setting. In doing so, they are encouraging individuals to redefine what beauty really is, in this case, through appearance. Macy's is sending the message to their buyers that their products provide individuals the opportunity to express themselves in whatever way they want with their new spring collection. By going beyond the boundaries that are socially installed our expectations are expanded.

As silly as it sounds, the Macy's advertisement made me think. It made me think of the concept of beauty, and how we perceive it.

Beauty to us is a social construct. You scroll through your feed of bronzed, tall and thin figures and you are fed to think that she is the one and only form of beauty worth striving for. You look in the mirror and pick out your flaws and imperfections thinking that it lessens your beauty. We are taught to believe that beautiful has one meaning and that definition cannot stray from the cover of a magazine.

But in reality, Beauty is fluid. It is what you want it to be. It is an appearance. It is a perception. It is imperfect.

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