The Metaphors In 'Zombieland' [Part II]

The Metaphors In 'Zombieland' [Part II]

As the virus spreads...

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"You have once again entered… The world of survival horror." – Resident Evil

If you've already read the previous, accompanying article to this one, welcome back. If not, let's catch you up to speed. Zombies are not alive, not dead, bloodthirsty creatures with severe anger issues. They look to tear down anyone in their path, accountability nowhere in sight. Some real-life humans could be, and probably have been, described as the walking dead; bloodthirsty creatures with severe anger issues who look to tear down anyone in their path, accountability nowhere in sight.

Zombieland follows the cowardly Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg), as he navigates his way through the United States of Zombieland. Flooded with ravenous, flesh-eating freaks, a few questionable survivors, and a ton of laughs in between, Columbus explains how he has survived this long on his own. He strictly follows the rules. His rules.


RULE #18 | LIMBER UP

This rule lines up right behind Rule #1 from The Metaphors In 'Zombieland' [Part I]. To refresh your memory, Rule #1 is Cardio. Cardio wards off stress. Toxic people (zombies) cause stress. Ipso facto, keeping in shape is a great way to deter the stress caused by these types of people, or at least minimalize it. Limbering up is a precursor to cardio. Staying loose will help ensure you don't experience any strain while working out. Keeping limber and practicing cardio are both great on their own, but exponentially better together. This is the same in a metaphorical sense. As I said, keeping in shape is a great way to deal with stress. However, you don't want to turn into an uptight gym freak (that's the opposite of what we're going for here). Not to mention, you can't necessarily run to the gym every time some toxic douche bag decides they want to take you down a notch. So, aside from stretching, a great practice is limbering up your mind. Practice meditation, yoga, breathing exercises- whatever keeps you even-tempered and ready to be your best self. When you combine mindful practices with exercise, dealing with stressful people becomes easy. You'll likely start to pity them. You have to keep in mind people aren't just born assholes. Perceptions and personal circumstances have a lot to do with why people are the way they are. But at the end of the day, we all have a choice. Limber up before you make yours.

RULE #22 | WHEN IN DOUBT KNOW YOUR WAY OUT

This one is simple enough. While Columbus is checking for backdoors, you should be checking your instinct. Whether it be at work, home, class, whatever, If you're regularly in situations where you have to deal with toxic people, but you can avoid them, check your gut instinct. If you're doubtful that the potential experience you're about to have is going to be a positive one, what's the point of being there? As the famous author of 'Chicken Soup for the Soul' says, "If it ain't fun, don't do it."

I think the biggest, or maybe easiest, targets for toxic people to hit are people pleasers. If you're reading this, and you're a people pleaser, I'm telling you straight up, you're allowed to say no. You're allowed to cancel plans you've made. You're allowed to ignore your phone. You're allowed to decline doing things without giving a reason, especially if those things entail a bunch of stress, sans fun. You are in control of your own life. Remember that and live by it. And for those situations you can't avoid, know your way out. Compromise. If it's work, interact with the person(s) as little as acceptably possible. If it's social, make an appearance, stay an hour or two, and leave. It's your life. Make it a good one.


Bill is a 31-year-old writer/game developer from Boston, Massachusetts. He's a content creator in Southern New Hampshire University's Odyssey community, a member of the National Society of Leadership and Success, and is wrapping up his Game Development program in October 2018. With an Associate's in Liberal Arts and a forthcoming BS in Game Development, he is ready to excel in the gaming industry. Outside of work, Bill can be found supporting local bands in the greater Boston area.

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An Honest Review Of ItWorks! From Someone Who Doesn't Sell The Products

No, I'm not looking for you to "join a team" or begin any challenges.
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I'm sure you've seen your friends on Facebook transition from friend to salesman. Whether it be for Scentsy, LipSense, or AdvoCare; multi-level marketing companies are on the rise thanks to social media. ItWorks! remains one of the most prominent.

ItWorks! is a health and wellness company using primarily plant-based ingredients without any artificial sweeteners or coloring. Their "number one seller" is the famous body wraps but the company is mostly weight loss supplements and vitamins. The company has a passion for the natural over the synthetic. Co-founder Mark Pentecost states on the site's Our History page that "you want to know that you're putting the very best things in your body."

Since most reviews of these products come from distributors, who are therefore biased, I have reviewed three of their greatest products and one I believe you should avoid.

1. Greens™ Blend Chocolate

As a vegan, I sometimes have to double check that I'm receiving the proper nutrients. ItWorks! Greens have been saving my life lately. It contains 52 herbs and nutrient-rich superfoods as well as 34 fruits and veggies. It is meant to alkalize, balance, and detoxify.

This is my favorite product! It gives me energy and even fills in for breakfast sometimes. It honestly makes me feel great. Then again... they always said eating all your fruits and veggies would!

ItWorks! gives you those healthy servings in a delicious chocolate flavor (which is bomb with almond milk). Make sure you use a blender bottle or blender. Like many powdered supplements, it can have that grainy aftertaste.

2. Advanced Formula Fat Fighter™

The idea behind this supplement is that it’s "okay to indulge if you have your Fat Fighters." Basically, if you just must have that sweet treat or piece of bread then you can take this pill within an hour to prevent your body from absorbing the carbs and a portion of the fats. If you're anything like me, you eat what you want when you want, so you'll end up taking these pills on the daily.

The main reason I like the Fat Fighters is that they reduce cravings and I normally have such a sweet tooth!

3. ThermoFIGHT™

This product is meant to increase calorie burning, boost the rate of your metabolism, and boost your energy. Like with Greens, I definitely feel energized when I take this supplement. Not in a jittery or wired way, either.

They say "abs start in the kitchen" but I'll try and cheat the system when I can!

4. Ultimate Body Applicator™ and Defining Gel™

This is the ItWorks! claim to fame... and that ASTOUNDS me.

I used to be so skeptical of this company because of the wraps. I tried them three different times and was not impressed each time. The ultimate body applicator and defining gel are meant to tighten and tone the skin to redefine the appearance of your body’s contour. Sure, you'll receive those results... just at an outrageous price. It's an expensive product that requires a lot of re-purchasing in order to receive any drastic results. Not to mention the most drastic results are just reduction of water weight.

They're really just an overpriced skin firming lotion. I suggest finding a nice cream from Target and sitting in the sauna instead.

If your facebook-friend-turned-salesman pushes for you to buy the wraps, just remember that I warned you.

I would like to give an honorary mention to KetoCoffee (probably their second most popular item). Because it is not vegan, I have not given it a try. I have heard amazing things from multiple women, though. Most keto coffee recipes give people the shakes and amp them up too hard. I've heard that ItWorks! has perfected the recipe.

I have used the first three products for a little over three months now. Sometimes I am inconsistent and miss servings. However, I match these products with a vegan diet (mostly whole foods based) and 3-4 days of exercise. I do not have drastic results but I have lost a little over ten pounds and feel great each day. I plan to remain a customer with this company (I have Greens on Autoship!).

I feel so blessed to be a Loyal Customer with ItWorks! because I receive up to 40% off and free shipping after three months. Without this discount, I probably never would have given this company a second thought. I highly recommend going that route because, well...

Cover Image Credit: Savanah Garcia | Instagram

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I'm Chronically Sick And It Made Me Appreciate The Little Moments In Life

My doctor's office became a second home to me, but never gave me the answers I needed.

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People get sick all the time, a cold here, the flu there. It doesn't seem like anything out of the ordinary to get sick a few times a year - I wish that was the case for me.

I have always been the kid in class who seemed to get a cold every couple weeks. It never caused an issue in school, I always pushed through.

As I got older I got sicker.

If I look back at the last year and compare the times I was sick to my friends, you would be amazed. One of my friends would get a cold and it would pass in a few days. I would catch the same cold, and it would stay with me for multiple weeks. This happened every time someone around me was sick, it didn't matter that I had had the same virus two weeks prior. My body couldn't shut out illness.

I remember the day I came into the editor's office at the magazine I was working for and everyone froze at the sight of me. I had mono, strep throat, and a sinus infection - all at the same time. I looked like a walking ghost. To make it worse, I had already had mono and strep throat previously that winter.

My doctor's office became a second home to me, but never gave me the answers I needed. Everything was just a little annoying until it got serious.

Halfway through fall semester at Washington State University, I faced the scariest medical moment of my life so far. I started getting stabbing pains in my left side. They escalated over the next couple weeks, but I didn't have the time to get it checked out. School, work, my friends, and my boyfriend at the time kept me busy.

It got to the point I couldn't stand it anymore.

When I finally went into the hospital the doctors were amazed I was still as active as I was. I had developed a massive infection in my left kidney. My doctor ordered a rush CT scan to ensure I didn't have to have surgery. In the meantime, I was on multiple painkillers and medications, bedridden for over a week. The results finally came back and I was in the clear. With that said, I now only have half of my left kidney function and it is unclear if I will gain it back.

I was lucky that I didn't lose my kidney from that infection. With that said, I lost my job, my depression levels rose and I barely passed my classes last semester due to the complications. My sickness had finally caught up with me, and that was the final straw.

Once I recovered from my infection I started seeing an immune specialist. We discovered that my sinuses had been stripped of all needed particles that filter out viruses and that my body was a boundaryless breeding ground for bacteria.

I'm defenseless against getting sick.

To this day we still do not know what is going on, but we are constantly doing testing to try to make my life as easy as it can be medical wise. I will always be sick, but the experiences I have had have only made me appreciate the little moments in life more. While I hate the fact I'm getting sicker, and it makes me struggle with self-love, it is something I'm constantly learning from.

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