"All or nothing,"
"No days off,"
These two quotes are what I lived by. Or, what I thought I should live by.
It wasn't until about 10 days ago that I realized these two quotes are definitely motivational but should be taken with a grain of salt.
Most young adults around my age have a lot of pressure on them, both external and internal. Trying to get A's, building up resumes with extracurriculars, internships, friendships, relationships, and maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
Most of these are external factors of pressure and stress, but a perfectionist like myself will settle for nothing short of the best.
At this moment, I am taking 16 credits, hold a position in my sorority, attend extracurricular events, work out every day and eat right. This may sound ideal and "goal-type" for someone my age, and I can't complain.
But there's something I lack in the midst of all this: a break. I am someone who always needs to be doing something. There is no "me time", aside from my workouts.
And again, it wasn't until two weeks ago when I collapsed.
After a 72 hour weekend of speed-dating girls for recruitment, lack of sleep, and ample amounts of anxiety and stress, I finally realized what I needed: me time.
So I called my mom and told her I needed to come home for the weekend. Naturally, she had no hesitation and was at Temple by noon on Friday to take me home.
Naturally, I ran to the gym for all three days of my weekend. I tried to make time for everyone I wanted to spend time with and ultimately wound up neglecting the rest my body and mind needed so badly.
On Sunday afternoon, I collapsed. Exhausted, anxious, sore, and just plain tired. I went to my mom and told her about all the things I was feeling, and she was understanding.
Instead of returning to school on Monday morning, I took a me day. Naturally, I hit the gym. But I took it easy and listened to my body for once. I spent the evening with my mom and just relaxed.
Tuesday, I came back to Temple with a clear head. I felt recharged and ready for the week.
Sometimes, it's okay to not be okay. It's okay to ask for help and it's okay to take a rest. And this is something I finally understand.
So if you're someone who always feels the need to be doing something, and feel guilty when you're not, force yourself to take a break. Take a bath, listen to music, watch a movie. Whatever your form of relaxation might be, your body and your mind will thank you later.