In order for our country and our world to continue progressing into becoming a safe place for all kinds of people, we as citizens need to understand what it means to be an ally. Being an ally entails recognizing your privilege and understanding that not everyone has the same privileges and not everyone has the same experiences that you have had in life, whether or not you grew up in the same area. That being said, I do want to preface by saying that by recognizing privileges, you aren't negating validity to your own problems. That's the kind of thinking that hinders a lot of kindhearted from becoming allies. You are allowed to have problems and complain. Your emotions are valid. However, there are many people in the world (and yes, in your own community) who are going through experiences that you might not have had, due to the color of their skin, their sexual orientation, and even their gender. Recognizing where you have certain advantages allows you to open your eyes and see the many disadvantages that other people have that you wouldn't have recognized before.

Personally, I grew up thinking that my problems were the end of my world. My parents legally immigrated here from India. My dad had a well-paying job, and we lived in a nice house in a very suburban neighborhood in northern Kentucky. Yes, my skin is brown and I developed issues due to the beauty standards that I grew up with, my role models consisted of Lizzy McGuire and Zoey from Zoey 101. To me, not having lighter skin and blonde hair was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. However, I was fortunate enough to not have any traumatic experiences with blatant racism. The worst thing that's ever happened to me, along those lines, was someone asking me in 6th grade if I was the type of Indian that worked at 7-Eleven or the type that danced around a fire, and if I'm being honest with you, he's probably riding the struggle bus these days with that kind of unabashed, stereotypical thinking in his mind. Though, at the time I was very irritated and disturbed by that comment. However, it was also in middle school when I heard about the shooting of Trayvon Martin and that was when my perception of my own struggle with my skin was not even close to how some people in my community were struggling.

Once you recognize your own entitlements in certain areas of life, is when you become open to learning about the encounters that other people face in their daily lives. There are so many different kinds of people in this world, and we are very lucky to live in a country where essentially everyone is free to be who they are without fear of physical punishment from the government. However, it's difficult to deny that societally and at times within the laws of our own country, there are certain discriminations that people face. A perfect example would be the issue a few years ago that occurred where a couple was unable to buy a wedding cake from their local bakery because they were gay and that went against the religious beliefs of that owner. The government wanted to impose a law that allowed businesses to be able to refuse service to people because of their sexual orientation on the basis of infringement of religious rights. As someone who is bisexual, I can't necessarily look at this issue from an unbiased point of view; however, from an ally, I would hope that they would understand that those kinds of laws and rules make me and others like me, feel as though homophobism is protected by the law. It creates a space where it feels less safe to be who I am and love who I love, and those are the things I would hope someone who considers themselves an ally would understand.

Most of all, an ally would be someone that is knowledgeable and unabashedly stand up for the rights of the marginalized in our community because when we all come together, it's easier to be able to move forward. People in marginalized groups aren't asking for things that are unattainable. For the most part, they're asking for equal treatment in the eyes of the law but mostly in the eyes of society. Black Lives Matter wants to bring awareness about systemic racism ingrained in our society, and though in the eyes of the law everyone is seen as equal, it's willful ignorance about the struggles that so many African-American people go through daily, that doesn't allow for growth and creates an unsafe place for them in our society. The LGBTQ+ community wants an understanding of their identities and respect for who they are as people. Immigrants, both legal and illegal, want people to understand that they are still people, regardless of the color of their skin. And so on...

Whether or not you are part of a marginalized group, everyone is going through the human experience, and when we start looking at one another with compassion, coming from both sides, there will be no progress.