I remember being at school last semester, a thousand miles away from my mom, trying to find the time to call her. I’d have a few minutes between classes but wanted to dedicate more than a few breathless sentences to her. Then, after an exhausting French class (thanks, Olivier), I just wanted to c h i l l before starting my homework. Then dinner and hanging out with friends, followed by more homework, followed by a deep sleep before my day started over again. It wasn’t always like this, but I found myself pushing off talking to my family members more and more. I never wanted to be dependent on our phone calls, knowing it would raise red flags about whether I was ready to be so far from home, but I wanted to talk to them just to catch up, let them know how I was and find out how they were doing.

Once, after going nearly two weeks without a call to my mom, I carved out time to talk to her and apologize for going so long. She said that I shouldn’t worry, that I would make time to call her when I needed to talk, and something about that reassurance really bothered me. I didn’t want to talk to my mom when I needed her; I wanted to talk to her because I wanted to. It’s kind of like saying you love to read but never have the time, despite the countless hours we spend watching TV or messing around on the computer every day. If something is important to us, we will make time for it.

This summer, everyone is busy. I have a summer job, my mom works, my brothers work, my friends work. Typically, my friends are free in the evenings, the same time my family is free, and I go to hang out with them. No one makes me feel guilty about this, of course, but as I watch the quotable pages get torn out of the calendar every day, I’ve realized that summer is flying by. I’m excited to get back to NYU, to spend time with people I haven’t seen for months, but I’m also sad. I already miss my family.

Therefore, for those who feel the same, I think it’s time we just do what we want to do. I don’t want to be that kind of writer who spouts all this wisdom (psh, I wish) but never follows through with it herself. I want to do the stuff I say I am going to do just in case any of you have questions or are nervous about it. I want to be able to say I am going to make time for my family and then do it, rather than complain until it’s too late.

Whatever your relationship is with your family, if you are feeling a similar way, start doing something about it. Honestly, this doesn’t just concern family time, either. Sometimes, we text our friends that we want to hang out but never make a plan. The days are being crossed out on our calendars, and each day we do not live with intention cements this feeling in our guts. So for now, try to live with intent. Get lunch with your Mom, play frisbee with your brother, or see a movie with friends. Now.