We have all had that one friend...
That one that you clicked with and seemed to have a mutual understanding. You somehow became inseparable. You knew everything about each other including the intimate details about each other's lives.
Yet, in the blink of an eye, all things changed.
To the lying best friend,
Back before college I mostly hung out with guys. So when college hit, it was hard to be thrown into a dorm hallway with 40 other girls that I did not know. In the past, I only had a few girl friends. It was much easier that way; just enough drama to keep me going. My first roommate I thought of those close friends, and then I realized I was completely mistaken.
You came into my life when I needed you the most. I was vulnerable and broken. You came at a time when my first roommate had left me. She had emotionally beaten me. Making me believe that I was worthless and not able to have an undeniable connection with another girl apart from back home. Luckily, you lived next door and moved in when she moved out. Suddenly, you seemed to fill that gaping hole in my life: a college best friend.
The one thing I ask from a friend is the truth. I always tell people that walk into my life "I much rather you be honest then you lie to me and I find out." Some may be wary of hurting my feelings, but I rather have my feelings be hurt than loose trust in someone I care so much about.
As soon as you moved in, you quickly became my go to. When I needed anything; including a tampon, I wasn’t hesitant to ask. You seemed to do the same. We could sit on the beds and talk for hours. Laughing and crying at anything and everything that came our way.
We bonded. We did everything together. You were there when I was heartbroken and needed a shoulder to cry on. You held my hand and pushed me to ask for what I needed instead of what that boy wanted. After that boy had changed into a man, things began to change with us. You changed.
You were not so supportive of my decisions. You seemed to be scared of him hurting me again, rightfully so, but you never once gave him a chance. You told me how much you hated him and how you would not support me if I got back together with him. When I got back together with him, you could not stop dishing out the negative comments.
After asking the two of you to mend things, things seemed to get better, except, you began to treat him like a stranger. When you saw him, you spoke to him in that high pitched voice that people use on the telephone when speaking to someone they need something from. It took me some time to clear my clouded judgment. I finally realized you had lied. You still did not like him.
I would spend hours trying to understand why. He had done nothing to you. Never hurt you or said mean words. He would write you notes, bible verses and talk to you about hometowns when you guys were around each other. If you needed a snack, he’d buy it for you. Man, I wish my best friend’s boyfriend was that good of a friend.
I still do not get it. When you try to explain, you just say that you did not want to lose time with me. I thought you knew that if you called or ask, I would have come. I guess you did not realize. You became more distant. Yet, every time I asked if something was wrong, you would not tell me or just say that everything was fine. You lied.
In high school, I never had to nurture a friendship. If we did not talk for a week, we could pick up right where we left off. I figured all girl friendships were like this. If I wanted to nurture a relationship, I would get a boyfriend; which I did.
You dropped me like a fly. Turned our friends against me, like I had done wrong for being in a relationship. I wish you would have told me the truth when you first had an issue, maybe we wouldn't be where we are today if you had told the truth.