Everyone struggles with finding themselves. Here's a synopsis of my journey towards my roots.

For those of you on here who don't know me, have never seen my face or heard my name. Welcome. I'm Taylor, an 18-year-old Florida girl, with a big ole afro, trying to figure out the college athlete life in Alabama 6+ hours away from home. Now I wasn't always this confident curly headed girl. Having hair as big and as curly as mine and having more melanin than your average joe didn't exactly make it easy for me to become comfortable with the skin that I'm in.

Growing up where I did, being a little black girl wasn't very common. With that, and being as young as I was, at the time I was very impressionable as most kids are at a young age. When I looked around, I felt this horrible overwhelming, uncomfortable feeling because I knew everyone was looking at me. I felt as if I was weird or there was something wrong with me. Being young, and not really knowing any better all the kids around me pretty much solidified my feelings. I vividly remember sometime in the first grade, one of my classmates told me that my natural hair looked like snakes and the whole class laughed at me. I don't think he meant it maliciously, but it did change my life for a very long time.

I can't claim to remember all of what happened in the coming years after that moment, but I do remember that it involved a lot of crying, chemicals, and flat irons. From that day forward up until my freshman year, I hated my hair and so many other things that went along with being a young black girl. As I got older I watched how the people around me acted and the looks they would give me when I was around. It began to feel more and more like I was never going to fit in. I mean I've had people sneakily follow me around the store as if I was going to steal something. I've had people literally stare me down with some kind of crazy eyes as if they had just seen a ghost.

I've even had someone in a store tell me that "the clearance section is that way, but you probably won't be able to afford anything anyway." All because I was black.

Time went on and I became less and less oblivious. I started to notice as the looks became stares and the snickering became laughing and things just escalated from there. The best part was when I would start to like a guy and they would hit me with the "I don't like black girls." I didn't understand the skin I was in and what was so wrong with it, but at the time I knew I didn't like it. I was literally nothing like any of my friends. I wasn't "skinny" or fit in a size 0. I didn't have long straight hair, and most of my time was spent getting all sweaty outside playing soccer instead of inside at birthday parties or playing with my friends.

It definitely wasn't easy, nor was it fun to deal with all of the constant judgment. It took me more than half of my life to become okay with and love the skin that I'm in.

It wasn't until about 4 and a half years ago that I decided I wanted to cut basically all of my hair off and go natural. It was one of the scariest things that I've ever done. I didn't know how it was going to look or how people were going to react, but I knew that I wanted to start over and go back to my true healthy self, and so that's what I did. It's been a long process up to this point and I still have my good days and bad days just like everyone else. I still have the things that I'm insecure about or that I don't love about myself, but they are things that I know I can fix. Things that are normal to want to work on or get better. All that means is that I'm human because I'm not perfect.

Here I am at 18, all these years later absolutely in love with my melanin-filled skin, my big thighs, curly hair, and athletic self. I am the happiest and most confident that I have ever been. Yes, I still get judged and made fun of all the time, every day even. Yes, people still stare. Yes, I still have people question the things that I do. Yes, I do get scared to go places or be in certain situations because of the color of my skin. No, I am not ashamed of it by any means just because others are ignorant.

Coming to the realization that I am beautiful, important and worthy, despite what others said or did wasn't easy and it wasn't instant, but it happened.

I am BEYOND blessed to be born the way that I was and to have parents that encouraged and supported and raised me to be such a powerful young woman. The most important lesson I learned was to just be who I am. It doesn't matter what other people think because there's always going to be someone who judges you. You are above them though and the hateful things they say may hurt, but they only say them to make themselves feel better. It takes time, but learn about yourself and love whoever that is because that is you, and there is only one of you, which is the beauty of being who you are.