Throughout my childhood, I lived under the same roof of a narcissist. A soul-sucking person that reels you in just to push you back down. It never fully affected me until I saw the effects on my mother and I’ve learned to keep my guard up ever since then.
It was never apparent to me that this person’s actions had full effect on me as a child. I witnessed a person who created an allusion that their lack of empathy towards others was because of their past experiences in life. In reality, they lacked any emotional or physical support for others in general.
Happiness is completely temporary in the world of the narcissist. And as I grew older, I noticed that the feelings of happiness were very short-lived and fragile whenever they were around. But my life was never full of gloom, I enjoyed a lot of my childhood. But going home to know that the world around me was delicate, was very unsettling.
Even though I was young, I could still see past the lies and the fake, charismatic actions of this person. Their actions were solely so they could benefit from it and I saw how it affected others around me.
Today, I have learned the warning signs of when a narcissistic person comes into your life. These people acquaint themselves with excuses, lies and being self-absorbed. Their life revolves around materialistic items, the assumption that everyone approves of them and that they are never wrong. It took me years as a young child to see how this affected my mother and the rest of my family. The narcissist would try to praise you and raise you up, right before they would demean and snub you.
So looking back at my past, I understand why I had lost trust in others and kept my guard up. I began to believe that it was common for people to praise then humiliate and to love, then cheat. It has been a slow process, but I am learning to see the warnings signs. I hope you pay attention to them too.