Waking up to a tequila-induced hangover, I remember the dreams of the night before. I sat up in bed going over every soft smile, every needed tear, every curse word from the men of my past. Even after reminiscing, I’m still left questioning what the point of it all was. Surely, it could have been all for nothing.

I thought I learned about what the other person wants, I thought I was being taught about them. I hadn’t realized until now, it wasn’t a little about Brad, Danny, Steven, Keith or anyone else. This whole time I was getting closer and closer to understanding a little about me.

I didn’t need someone in my life that was unsafe and unsure of what they need. I can’t be involved with someone who drinks their pain away. Sometimes, if you let it, the one will get away. Last but least, I can’t be with a man who is already married... obviously.

But I can be a good influence and be a positive influence for someone who needs it. I can provide support to people of all ages who may be battling their demons. I can be sure that the next relationship I enter will be different and smart but also fueled with great emotions.

So maybe I am alone, but that doesn't make me any less valuable. It doesn't tarnish my worth in any way. When I was younger in high school, I was told to "guard my heart." Never had I understood what that meant until now.

By being alone, I am guarding my heart against all the things that are not for it. Do not beat yourself down, being single can be a great time in one's life. Life today makes it look like the only way you can be happy is if you have your dream job and you're married to your dream man, with a Visa that never declines.

Real life, is hardly ever like that. Until it is, I am no longer continuing to give time and effort to people that will only be here for the season. I am better off spending that time investing in me, waiting optimistically ever after.