With another year comes another great expanse of future that can seem somewhat daunting. So many possibilities! So many dreams to chase! So many people to love! Yet I must sit my anxious heart down and ask, why is that scary? Why must the future be scary?

A horizon of endless possibilities is exhilarating. Dreams are incredible— that your mind has the ability to fathom things that which do not yet exist, and that you have the ability to reach for them. Even if you fail, the journey is a dream-splattered masterpiece full of the potential for growth. Why, then, is there always a knot in my stomach when my eyes are turned towards what’s ahead?

The older I get, the stranger life gets, and all the more terrifying. Wait, you mean I have freedom? I get to choose the way my life pans out (except, of course, the fact that it’s really more of a beautiful tapestry weaved by the good Lord)? It seems I have to remind myself on a daily basis that everything is going to be okay, that goodness spans what is to come, just as every moment of breath brings with it unfathomable goodness.

But fear still lodges itself somewhere within, and it becomes a daily battle with Jesus by my side to hold onto my dreams and to whisper to my heart that all shall be well.

These words carry significant weight. They were gifted to me by an extraordinary professor, who, after I frantically emailed her about issues my group was having with a project last quarter, sent me a quote from Julian of Norwich which goes, “All shall be well, all manner of thing shall be well.”

Man, if I could convince my brain of this truth, something which my heart has already been told time and time again!

I suppose what I’m trying to say here is that fear seems to be a significant companion of mine, as well as the rest of humanity, even though I know it has no place in my life. I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop writing about it. It makes me angry, truth be told. There are so many lies we are told— that we can’t do it, that we aren’t enough, that it’s just not possible, whatever it may be.

I am tired of each day eating away at me because I want to write, and I want to change the whole wide world, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to do it. I’m afraid I don’t have it in me, or that I’ll make the safe choices, or that I’ll let my gifts and potential slip away by making the wrong choices. And sure, I’ll make a lot of wrong choices.

But we have the ability to stand fear in the face and tell it to speak to our Creator. And I think I know what He would say.

Well, if I believe in a God who makes all things possible, I’d better let this notion that that’s impossible be crushed by love and truth. Don’t you see, heart? If you believe it, it becomes real. So believe. Believe in fearlessness.