To all of the younger girls out there,

As a freshman who just finished her first semester of college, I have already learned so much. Looking back, there are things I wish I could tell myself to keep myself from making some of the mistakes that I did. My hope is to share some of my new insight with you, so that you can avoid some things you might regret.

1. Your looks aren’t everything.

I know that this is incredibly cliché, but it’s so true. A few years from now, nobody is going to remember that you had fifteen different Kat Von D lipsticks or the latest Michael Kors bag. In fact, that very rarely impresses people in college, where most of your peers would rather sleep an extra half-hour than get up early to do a full face of makeup each day. When I think back to the people I remember the most in high school, I do not think of the girls who kept up with all the latest trends, I think of the ways people treated me and how they impacted me, whether it be positively or negatively. This is not to say that you should never put any effort into your appearance - there will be times where you need to dress for success, and it is okay to want to look nice. It is important, however, to understand that your looks are not the most important part of you.

2. Appreciate your parents.

People come and go in your life, but your parents are here to stay. You may not realize it right now, but you are going to miss them like crazy when you leave home. Appreciate everything they do for you, from making you dinner to driving you all over town. Don’t be embarrassed of them or push them away. They love you more than you can even fathom, and they only want the best for you.

3. Do what you love.

You will get all kinds of opinions on how you should and should not live your life. Ultimately, the only opinion that matters is your own, because you will have to live with the choices you make. I’ve received tons of unwanted criticism on what I’ve chosen to major in, but there is liberation in not caring what others think of you. Whether it is big or small, take time to focus on the things that make you happy, even if other people don’t approve.

4. Don’t procrastinate.

I can feel the eye rolls from here. You’ve heard it before, and I’ll say it again for you: do not procrastinate. Procrastination is something I really struggled with in high school, but it’s something I’ve greatly improved on since getting into college. It’s amazing how much better my life has gotten because of it. Believe it or not, you’ll have so much more time to hang out with your friends or binge watch Netflix if you get your work done in a timely manner; plus, you’ll save yourself lots of stress and late nights. From a fellow procrastinator, trust me on this one; if you break the cycle now, you’ll thank yourself later.

5. Relationships aren’t everything

Ladies, I know he’s like the cutest boy you’ve ever laid eyes on, and you’ll just die if you don’t get to be with him, but I’ll let you in on a little secret: being in a relationship is not everything. I’m not here to criticize you or tell you that your relationship won’t last, but I will say that I live in a residence hall full of girls who regret dating in high school because they weren’t ready. I myself have never been in a relationship, and it’s probably the best decision I’ve ever made. Society puts so much pressure on us to find someone that many girls end up settling for someone that will ultimately just waste their time and break their hearts. Don’t rush into anything you aren’t ready for, and don’t settle for anything less than you deserve.

6. Do extracurricular activities.

Take part in as many extracurricular activities as possible. Whether it be volunteering at your local animal shelter, joining school clubs or partaking in sports, find things that you love to do and be a part of them! One of my biggest regrets in high school was not doing enough extracurricular activities. Not only do they look good on college applications and resumes, they help you figure out what you’re passionate about, and help you meet people who share your interests.

7. Take time to get to know yourself.

This is one that far too many people overlook. Knowing yourself is extremely important, so start learning as much about yourself as possible. Figure out your interests and hobbies. Spend time with yourself, and think about who you are and who you want to be. Deeply knowing yourself helps strengthen your relationships and boosts your confidence. A great place to start is by taking the Meyer’s Briggs test. (I’m generally not a huge believer in the accuracy of personality tests, but this one is fairly reliable, and has helped me learn a lot about myself.)

8. Surround yourself with people who make you better.

The people you hang out with are inevitably going to rub off on you, so surround yourself with people who will influence you in positive ways. Make friends with people of good character, who you strive to be more like. Having a mentor also helps, whether it is a teacher, a counselor, a college student or your pastor/youth pastor’s wife. Older women can offer you insight on things that you’ve never thought of. Plus, it’s beneficial to have a trustworthy person you can talk to without fear of being judged.

9. Appreciate little things.

Sunsets. Bubble baths. Cuddling with your dog. Some of the simplest things in life that we often take for granted are some of the best things. Unfortunately, some of these things won’t last forever, so appreciate them as much as possible while they’re here. I never realized how many of these things I would miss once I left for college, so take time to be grateful for all the little blessings in life.

10. Be informed about the world.

Yes, I want you to watch the news and read the newspaper (don’t worry, you can do it from your iPhones). I understand what a horrifying thought this probably is for you, but I cannot stress the importance of this. I absolutely hated doing this only a few short years ago, but once I was forced by my high school government class to keep up to date on current events, I found out politics was a passion of mine I never knew was there. When you take the time to learn what is going on in the world, you will probably find a cause that you want to advocate for. It is important that the upcoming generations know what is going on within our world, so that they can take steps toward making it better.

11. Be bold.

Stop wasting time being afraid of what everyone else will think of you- dare to be bold. Speak up about the things you believe in, stand up for the injustices around you, and don’t live in fear of not fitting in. Dare to do the things that scare you, because they are the things that will allow you to grow. Don’t let anyone tell you what your limits are- that’s for you to decide.

12. Learn as much as possible.

I know that you see school as a chore, but try to soak up the knowledge you are being provided with. The world is such an amazing place with so many amazing things to take in. Whether it be literature, math, science, or history, the more you know, the better off you will be. Intelligence is attractive, so take advantage of what’s left of your free education.

13. Be kind.

Being kind is one of the greatest things a person can be. Kindness is far too rare in our society, and it is a virtue I wish more people would seek to possess. Being kind will change the lives of those around you and yourself. I am not always a kind person, but by being more intentional to show kindness to those around me, I have become more optimistic and happy. Kindness is completely free, and it is something you will never regret being.

14. Learn to spend your money wisely.

I understand the struggle of wanting to impulsively blow any money that comes your way on new shoes or going out with your friends on Friday night. Please listen when I tell you that you need to learn how to budget your money now. Managing your finances is a skill that will serve you well the rest of your life.

15. Invest in your relationship with Christ.

This is the most important thing on this list. Seriously, don’t neglect your relationship with God- it will come back to bite you. Chase after Him, and entrust Him with your heart, and you will be better off. Of course, you will still make mistakes, but you can save yourself a world of pain and regret by investing in your spiritual walk.

Sincerely,

A college freshman