Dear No One,

I don't know who I'm writing to; there's no one in particular. I just feel a need to write to tell you what's up. It's been awhile since I've written to no one. Instead, it's always writing an email to a professor, a peer, an important person who expects a quick response. I'd rather just talk to no one because I can tell them the truth. I can tell them how I feel, what I'm scared of, etc.--topics that people never ask you as a passerby, usually topics that even close family members tend to avoid. Instead, most people ask, "how's school? how's grandma? what did you say you were doing next year?" It seems like people are more interested in what surrounds you instead of you. I don't blame the people; I blame no one.

Seeking out a friend to talk to is hard to do--especially when you are shy or lack social skills to meet new people. For some, alcohol is the key to coming out of your shell. Those people are lucky because many people just give up. There's nothing intimate about a drunk conversation with a stranger at a party or bar. You don't learn about a person's character at 3am on a Saturday night. It's the same set of questions you here over and over in doctors' offices, church greetings, and family gatherings. Why can't we discuss the topics that destroy the heart? It's because of an unease that surrounds the conversation. We avoid the conversations that remind us how messed our lives really are.

I think I'm going crazy. I'm not sure who I'm writing to in this letter, but thank you for listening. Is it someone I miss or someone who doesn't exist? Or is it someone I wish to meet? Sometimes it feels like I'm writing to loneliness. I think young people my age get confused about the difference between being lonely and being alone. You have an option: being lonely means you can call a friend or family member to talk to about your problems; on the other hand, being alone means you have nowhere to go and you have no one. There is no alternate.

Signed,

No One