To My Friends From High School

To My Friends From High School

High school was high school. Life now during College and after can never compare.
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Life was simpler in high school. Going to a small school and having such a small class we couldn’t imagine ourselves being inseparable right? I guess things change three years later and we don’t even talk anymore.

Contrary to popular and other people's beliefs I do blame myself for what happened, but it’s too late to turn back now. There are just some things I really wanted to say that I didn’t get to say in person.

I want to thank you all, each individually for having some part in shaping the woman that I am today and for being my best friends. I grew in my faith which got me through my first year of college. Thank you for the laughter giving to me in those tough times in defeat. Thank you for being the person whom I ran to at 3 a.m. with tears in my eyes.

The dance circles we created at every dance and prom along with the sleepovers and binge watching of movies and talks about boys. Those happy times are unforgettable along with those bad times as well.

When we went off to college we became so engulfed in our own worlds that we grew apart. Our frequent texts turned into “I’ll talk to you later”. Our “I’ll talk to you later” turned into “I’ll call you back tomorrow”. Those “I’ll call you back tomorrow” turned into silence. I can’t pinpoint the time I felt myself change but it happened and I don’t regret it.

Could things have ended differently? Yes. Could I had expressed my feelings a little more during that hard time during freshman year of college? Yes, but it felt like you didn’t care so it was easier for me to walk away.

There’s not a day that goes by where I don’t feel that regret of our friendship ending, and I wish I could change it but at the same time I can’t continue to live in the past. High school was high school. Life now during college and after can never compare. I am at a point in my own life where I feel the happiest and content.

I am very proud of the people that you’ve become today. It makes me happy to see each of you so successful and happy with what you’re doing. I just hope that you guys understand that the same goes for me. Though I’m not the one you come to talk to when times are hard or during your happy times, I do genuinely wish you all the best.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To My Little Brother

Six things I want you to know.
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I am not your mother, but I am your big sister.

I cannot even apologize for it, I am always going to act like your second mom. I am going to keep yelling at you to (please) put down the toilet seat and to clean up the mess you made in the kitchen. It doesn't matter to me how often you say "I am not your mother," because you're my little brother and I'm always going to be the boss.

I never mean it when I tell you to grow up.

I hope that you have taken, and continue to take, full advantage of your childhood. As often as I complain about your maturity level, my wish for you is to put off growing up for as long as possible. The closer I get to real adult life, the more I miss home and all of the worries I didn't have. You shouldn't rush through the years you have left at home, you are doing just fine the way you are.

No, I didn't tell Mom.

All of our secrets will always stay secrets. I may have ratted you out to Mom about being the one to break her new vase, but I hope you know that our brother-sister bond protects all of the private things we share. Please, never forget that I'll always be here to listen to you.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for giving you your first bloody nose, and for laughing at you afterward. I'm sorry for every time I have blown you off for plans with a guy, or to get an extra hour of sleep. I'm sorry for yelling at you to leave me alone and for slamming the door in your face. I'm sorry for all of the times you asked me to play outside that I didn't. I'm sorry for all of my broken promises.

I forgive you.

I forgive you for all of the “little brother" insults you have used. I forgive you for using all of my paints and letting them dry out. I forgive you for embarrassing me in front of every guy I ever brought home. I even forgive you for cutting off that piece of my hair in fourth grade.

I am so proud of you.

It isn't said nearly enough, but I am so proud of you, little brother. I am envious of the passions that you have and the way that you pursue them with no fear! I am excited to see where you go in life (but don't go anywhere too quickly). Keep working hard and doing what you love, no one can fault you for following your heart. I love you so much, and I will always be your biggest supporter and fan!

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Summer = Rest?

Sometimes it feels as if we need a vacation... from our vacation.

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Ah summer: Popsicles and sun burns, mixed with fresh-squeezed lemonade that local kids are pandering to make enough money for Roman candles and Black Cats. The crack of the bat can be heard among the simmering charcoal grills and Troy-bilts humming through the ever-lasting sun. School is out and children are wild. It's a paradise.

Or is it?

But after countless sports camps and tournaments, other camps, vacations, school (?) events, traveling teams, VBS, summer seems to have been sucked fun-free.

Maybe it's Hollywood and Harper Lee's fault for giving us this utopian view of what summer should look and feel like (I'm looking at you Sandlot). But how can we really rest this summer? Because everyone needs some actual rest, even adults.

First thing is do NOT pack your summer full. Say no to some things. Coaches and Families can expect too much and it's okay to say no to them. You have to. There is no time for kids to be kids anymore.

Work can take a backseat. Vacations need to be taken. Families need to reconnect.

And for all my super-scheduled people out there, please PLEASE don't schedule out your vacation. Just enjoy it.

Another bit of advice would be to put away the technology and spend some time outside. When was the last time you tried to catch lightning bugs? Or went for a swim? Or listened to birds on your front porch?

I may sound like I have an old soul, but I really feel like we have lost this connection to the outside world. Summer is all about getting a farmer's tan and getting stung once or twice. I can guarantee you that's some of the best therapy in the world.

Maybe this sounds all over the place. Maybe this sounds like me ranting. And it probably is.

But I'm telling you that this stuff matters. Don't let summer whiz by and you arrive in August more drained that you were in May. Enjoy this time with family and friends.

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