Note: I am not attacking anyone who has done theatre with me. I do apologize if you feel like I am. Trust me, I’m not.

To my fellow disabled artists:

What is your passion? Do you love art? Do you love singing? Do you love acting? Or do you love to dance? All of these are wonderful choices! Beautiful pieces of art. But, here’s the thing: You are disabled. Because of your disability….

You have poor arm coordination, so it’s hard for you to draw, sketch, paint, or sculpt.

You have a speech impediment that makes your singing inaudible.

You are on a wheelchair/braces or a mobility impediment, so you can’t do complicated dance moves.

You don’t sound, look, or move like others and don’t fit in the role that you want.

You get rejected frequently because you are different.

Well, guess what? It is not your fault.

It took me a few years to realize this. I have been a disabled artist throughout my whole life. I have always loved to draw. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a dancer. My mom didn’t sign me up for ballet like I wanted, but I took creative movement classes, which was improvisation in dancing. I was in choir in elementary school, even though I always skipped rehearsal and started choir again in my senior year of high school. For ten years, I have done theatre. But, something always goes wrong for me.

For art, my cerebral palsy affects my hand movement. So, my drawing skills look like a 3-year old drew. So, I can’t be an illustrator or in character design. I can’t be a good artist like my grandmother was or my sister, who got her skills from her.

For my singing, cerebral palsy has given me a speech impediment, which makes me sound like a little girl. So, I don’t sound like a Elsa or a Belle.

For dancing, my legs are very stiff, so I can’t kick or jump high enough. I also have balance issues. Last, I got back surgery four years ago, so I can’t bend or get on the floor.

I have trouble with being an actress because of the two reasons above. Moreover, I have a tiny right hand and a huge mouth, so I’m not exactly what a normal person looks like. So, it’s hard for me to get into a show that’s outside of my school

And yes, I’ve been discriminated or at least have been treated differently by others.

On my first ever day of college in 2012, my very first class was a 2D Design class. I was excited. Scared that I wasn’t going to be as good as the others, but still excited. What happened next is not an exaggeration. My art professor took one look at me at class and thought how disabled I was. An hour after class ended, I was kicked out “because I couldn’t handle it.” And she never saw me work or anything. She gave me a graphic design class to make up for it. When I got into the BFA graphic design program at my four-year school, two years later, my graphic design professor told upfront to leave the major because I wasn’t good enough. She passed me on my gateway class literally because she felt sorry for me.

Today, four years later, my singing class at my college didn’t go as expected. With cerebral palsy as one of the reasons, I wasn’t a strong enough singer. So, therefore, my professor took away my ability to sing, so I sat there doing nothing while the others are singing.

When I was little, I always asked for my mom for ballet classes. I didn’t tell my mom this because I didn’t want to be ungrateful, but I was seriously furious that she signed me up for a improv dance class for disabled students. When I asked her recently why she didn’t take me to ballet, my mom told me that it was because she thought ballet would be too hard for me.

Ever since I started theatre, I felt like I was being treated differently. When I did my first show,"Schoolhouse Rock!", I was one of the only few people that didn’t get any lines. My sisters had lines, but not me. When I did "Annie, Jr." in eighth grade, I was the only eighth grader who was in the Ensemble. The eighth graders had a leading or a featured role, but I was only in the NYC number and the finale.

In my high school musicals, that’s when I felt left out more than ever. When I was in "Little Shop of Horrors", after being in the opening scenes, I had my own number that was about me. But…that was it. Those were my only scenes. Everyone else was in the rest of the show. When I was in "Footloose" a year later, I was only in the church choir scenes. Other than that, again, everyone else was in the rest of the show. I was in a jury scene, but I was in the audience, so it would be hard to see me. In my last musical, "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown", I was Woodstock! I thought I would finally have decent stage time. Like "Little Shop", I had one big scene. For the rest of the show, I would be on stage for a few scenes and leave. My first ever play and last school production, "Edith Stein," was really the only time I was on the stage for a long time. But, my senior bow gave me sadness. All of the seniors got whoops and hollers. I only got clapping.

In college, I gave up. I wanted to be a successful actress and was originally a Graphic Design/Theatre major. When I finally got into my university, they dropped the BA in Acting. I would had to audition to the BFA program to study acting. At that moment, I decided to quit acting for a while. I continued taking singing classes and that gave me back my passion for acting. But, after hearing myself sing, I decided to quit acting and singing for good. When I was with my BFA graphic design professor, she seriously discouraged me. I was literally about to drop out of college until I found out about my college’s Media & Communications Studies major. Oh, how things have changed after my hardships!

I may had drop out of my college’s BFA program, but I had a huge surprise waiting for me, last summer. Through my credits at my four-year university, I had receive my A.A degree in graphic design.

I’m back with singing. Not only my singing has gotten stronger, but I can also hit high notes. (And it turns out I am a soprano!)

I found dancing classes nearby and I plan to start them this summer.

As for acting, get this: I got my first lead role in a play this summer…at DC in a play festival! On the top of that, a disabled theater has opened in DC, so now ALL of the disabled actors have a shot in a lead role like me. Next fall, I’m returning to Howard Community College to get an AA degree in theatre and a letter of recognition in acting. Oh, and did I mention that I AUDITIONED for a Broadway play for a leading, disabled role? Yes, I didn’t get it, but I AUDITIONED for a Broadway play for a leading, disabled role! And recently, Broadway has had their first wheelchaired performer in a show with a deaf cast!

So, my friends, there is hope for all of us. Times are changing and art is about to get better and accessible for all of us. Please keep doing what you love! Will you be featured in the Metropolitan Art Museum or on a Broadway stage? No, but you’re not in for that. You are in for the love and passionate for the arts. You live for it and breathe for it. Your time will come. Just hang on, expand your horizons, and create! You are a role model for all. You will change the hearts and minds of everyone! Lead the way!