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17 Lessons For 21 Years, Brought To You By Tequila And Other Alcohol I Should Never Drink Again

Like vodka, and Bud Light, and, and, and...

Madison Zegarlowicz

Sep 24, 2018

University of Michigan

164

17 Lessons For 21 Years, Brought To You By Tequila And Other Alcohol I Should Never Drink Again

Madison Zegarlowicz

As 21 approaches, I'm both scared for what's to come and incredibly excited for new experiences. Twenty-one is a big deal, but with that comes college graduation, full-blown adulthood, and the big, wide world. Before that can happen, though, we must reflect on high points, mistakes, and just plain "What the f*ck was I thinking?!" moments.

Here are 21 lessons for 21 years, brought to you almost always by too much alcohol.

1. Seriously, if it's after 2 a.m. just go to sleep

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Don't text your ex. Don't assume that one more drink is okay. Just don't.

2. You can't stay up super late and still make it to that 8 a.m.

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I promise you, if you're up late, you might as well just scrap the idea of making it and start fresh next time. Take it from the girl who has had to give herself one too many morning pep talks.

3. He's not worth it

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He's not worth your tears or your wasted time waiting for him to become the good person you just know he can be.

4. No matter how cute he is

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Nope, still not worth it.

5. Know when it's time to walk away

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You deserve better.

6. Block his number, don't just delete it

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Honey, the temptation will still be there.

7. If you don't block his number, you will want to text him at some point. Don't do it.

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No "I miss you," no "come over"... Nothing.

8. Your friends are there for a reason, so don't second guess their intentions

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If they didn't want to support you, they wouldn't.

9. Some friends aren't forever, and that's OK

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College teaches you that more than anything else ever will.

10. You're allowed to let loose every once in awhile

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Yes, seriously.

11. But don't make a habit of it

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You'll regret it later.

12. It's OK to be the "Mom" or the "Grandma" in the friend group

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You can bug your friends to make sure they got home safe, be the DD, cook them dinner, whatever you do. They'll appreciate it, and no, you aren't weird for it.

13. Coffee is always the answer

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Sad? Coffee. Happy? Coffee. Stressed? Relaxed? Coffee.

14. But sometimes (most of the time) wine is the answer too

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See moods above, and then add every other emotion. Wine can fix that.

15. Your mom should be your BFF

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Because when wine doesn't cut it, Mom's pep talks always do.

16. Mr. Right might not be found at a college frat party

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Probably not, actually.

17. You are still growing up, and don't need all of the answers

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Not yet, anyway.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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17 Lessons For 21 Years, Brought To You By Tequila And Other Alcohol I Should Never Drink Again

Like vodka, and Bud Light, and, and, and...

1. Seriously, if it's after 2 a.m. just go to sleep

2. You can't stay up super late and still make it to that 8 a.m.

3. He's not worth it

4. No matter how cute he is

5. Know when it's time to walk away

6. Block his number, don't just delete it

7. If you don't block his number, you will want to text him at some point. Don't do it.

8. Your friends are there for a reason, so don't second guess their intentions

9. Some friends aren't forever, and that's OK

10. You're allowed to let loose every once in awhile

11. But don't make a habit of it

12. It's OK to be the "Mom" or the "Grandma" in the friend group

13. Coffee is always the answer

14. But sometimes (most of the time) wine is the answer too

15. Your mom should be your BFF

16. Mr. Right might not be found at a college frat party

17. You are still growing up, and don't need all of the answers

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10 ways to prepare for finals week—beginning with getting to the library.

Who knows where we would be without them.

1. Thank you for laughing at my jokes, even when they really aren’t funny.

2. Thank you for singing unbearably loud with me all the time.

3. Thank you for letting me vent to you for hours about anything and basically being my personal therapist.

4. Thank you for ordering pizza with me at 2 in the morning.

5. Thank you for all the movie days when we don’t feel like moving.

6. Thank you for being my workout buddy everyday.

7. Thank you for sharing your closets with me.

8. Thank you for taking naps with me at random hours during the day.

9. Thank you for cleaning our home with me when we absolutely need to.

10. Thank you for all the rides when it’s late and you don’t want me to walk home alone in the dark.

11. Thank you for studying with me in our kitchen when we didn't want to go the library.

12. Thank you for making dinner with me.

13. Thank you for helping with my hair, makeup and outfit every time we go out.

14. Thank you for taking countless ugly pictures with me.

15. Thank you for not judging me when I go too long without showering.

16. Thank you for making our apartment feel like a second home.

17. Thank you for being there through all of our boy troubles.

18. Thank you for giving me a hug when I feel homesick.

19. Thank you for getting excited with me when one of us gets a good grade on an exam.

20. Thank you for still being my friend and not judging me when I say or do dumb things.

21. Thank you for telling me what I should do when I am sick.

22. Thank you for dancing horribly with me everywhere we go.

23. Thank you for staying up super late with me when we aren’t tired or can’t sleep.

24. Thank you for being super weird with me.

25. Thank you for all the unforgettable college memories.

26. And most of all, thank you for being the best friends a girl could have.

I may or may not be stressing right now.

1. "What do I have to study for?"

2. "What class do I need to study for the most?"

3. "I’m going to ace this."

4. "Focus!"

5."I have no idea what I'm reading."

6. "I should call my smart friend about this."

7. "I’m going to fail. I’m going to fail."

8. "I’m dropping out of school."

9. "What grade do I have to get on the final to pass the class?"

10. "Oh, no, I have to do good."

11. "I shouldn’t have procrastinated all semester."

12. "I wanna go to bed."

13. "We did not learn this!"

14. "I should go get food."

15. "Why do we even have finals?"

16. "I don’t want to be at the library."

17. "Get off your phone."

18. "I can watch Netflix for like 20 minutes and then go back to studying."

19. "I shouldn’t have watched Netflix."

20. "You have to study now!"

The "Happiest Place on Earth" has a lot of characters with some pretty great advice.

Remember you’re the one who can fill the world with sunshine. — Snow White

The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it. — Rafiki

You don't have time to be timid. You must be bold and daring. — Lumière

If watching is all you're gonna do, then you're gonna watch your life go by without ya. — Laverne

Sometimes the right path is not the easiest one. — Grandmother Willow

Always let your conscience be your guide. — Jiminy Cricket

To infinity and beyond. — Buzz Lightyear

Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved. — Pooh

Let it go. — Elsa

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