“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.” - Anna Taylor

In any friendship, there should be mutual comfort and support for the other person.

But what happens if one of those people is too competitive, envious or negative towards the others successes or happiness? What if all of this is happening, yet you don’t recognize or don’t want to recognize it?

Well, in that case, you may be involved in a toxic friendship.

It’s hard for you to see when something, or someone, is bad for you if you’re used to it or you enjoyed being around that person at one point. Often times, we just don’t want to admit it.

I remember surrounding myself with people who I considered friends for many years. As we got older and there were more things that we could compete for, it started getting a little harder.

I remember always being sort of like the underdog. I became the friend who was called when someone else wasn’t available. Or the friend who was neglected and not spoken to for weeks on end, only to call the second it was convenient for them because they knew I’d always be there.

More times than I can count, the fact that I cared and would always be there was used to their advantage.

Quickly, I found myself becoming more and more saddened by the fact that these people I trusted and thought would always be there, aren't actually there for me.

I was always involved in various activities throughout my high school years, so I had other people who would see this type of behavior and wonder why I would put up with it. My answer was always that those were my friends and we had been friends for so long that I just didn’t want to lose them.

I felt weak for not leaving, but I was still too scared because I thought I’d have nobody.

But the truth is, I didn’t need them.

After dealing with this treatment for far too long, I became fed up. I surrounded myself with other people, people who made me happy, who supported me and who wanted the best for me. The kind of people my mom would tell me were good people to be around (and trust me, your mom's approval is VERY important, even if you don’t want to admit it right now).

These old friends of mine, not surprisingly, became resentful of this. I’d get nasty looks and hear them talking about me behind my back because I did what was best for me.

At first, it bothered me. But now I’m much better because of it and I’m not afraid to admit what I deserve based on who I am as a person – I'm unafraid to embrace that.

In the long run, what matters is how you feel and what you need to do to make yourself happy. Never think of yourself as weak for not tolerating something when you know you deserve better.