It's that time of the year when I start counting down the days until I have to ship myself back off to college. Sure, I only live about a half-hour away from my campus, but moving out of your home is always hard, especially when you think about the people you are leaving behind.
And Ian... this year is going to suck.
I would have never guessed almost eight years ago when we first started dating in the sixth grade that we would make it this far and still actually like each other. I would have never guessed that I would still get super excited whenever I got to see you and that I would still get butterflies in my stomach every time we would go on a date.
Regardless of what past-me thought, what current-me knows is that this is going to be Hell. It always is.
When you are someone that has a very close relationship with another person with another huge slap of separation anxiety added onto it, saying goodbye is almost impossible. Going from seeing you three days a week to one is going to be a stab in the chest, just like it was last year. Oh boy, we going to be a mess.
Over the course of these nearly eight years, we have become a power couple; unstoppable with a love for one another that grows and grows with every new adventure we take. You have been welcomed into my family and I thank my lucky stars every day that I have been welcomed into yours.
Last year, I bawled the entire morning while in the process of moving in. I held onto my cats for ten minutes each while sobbing, and they had no idea what was going on. I cried the entire drive to Cleveland State, keeping an eye on my fish, Magnus, who was sitting in his cup on my dash. And when it was finally time to move in and I was fine, I never told anyone how hard I cried when it hit me later that night as I tried to fall asleep.
And so yes, the hardest part of move-in will always be leaving you, watching you walk away, saying that I'll miss you when you'll be so far away.
I'll miss laying in your arms, telling each other bad jokes we found on the internet, making dinner together while watching baking shows on Netflix. I'll miss our adventures around our small hometown in the Corvette, getting ice cream just because we feel like it, and counting down the days until we get to move in together.
But, we have to do what we have to do. We have to go to college so that we can provide a better life for our future family. So that we can be successful. So that we can achieve all of the dreams we have together.
You'll only be about thirty minutes away, but it will feel like a lifetime. Sure, we can FaceTime and I'll see you on the weekends, but you will still be miles away when I wish you would be mere inches.
The hardest part of this is leaving you.