I hate math. I just hate it. It’s been my least favorite subject since the third grade when I (attempted to) learn long division and realized school wasn’t always going to come easy. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like every other school subject has come easily, I definitely have to study to get good grades, but math is different. Trying to understand a math problem for me is like trying to put a puzzle together with no picture to reference. It’s not impossible, but it is frustrating and almost always ends with me in tears because I just can’t understand why all the pieces aren’t fitting together.
The day I graduated high school and got to close my pre-calculus textbook for good, I vowed I would never take another math class… but it turns out math is a pretty common general education requirement in order to get a degree (I would know, I’ve been to three different universities).
I avoided taking college algebra for seven semesters, but here I am, two semesters away from graduation and I just can’t avoid it anymore. So, last Wednesday when the semester started I put my big-girl pants on, sucked it up and went to a math class for the first time in almost five years.
And it sucked.
For my entire school life math made me feel stupid and incompetent because no matter how hard I tried I was never good enough, and as soon as I sat down in that classroom all of those feelings came rushing back.
And then my professor said something that made me view the entire subject in a different light. He said, “Math is constant, it’s consistent and it is made up of elaborate details that can’t be changed.” What he meant was math isn’t random; it’s made up of intricate equations that are unchanging and unfailing.
If you think about it, isn’t math a lot like God?
There are times in my relationship with God where I don’t understand anything about Him. I can study His word and pray for hours, but there are always going to be things about the Lord that just aren’t clear. Of course, unlike math, we aren’t supposed to know everything about God.
Besides being confusing and sometimes frustrating, God is also consistent, elaborate and forever unchanging. He is the same yesterday, today and forever without fail. So no matter how confused I get about God’s plan or how much I just want to scream from lack of understanding, I can always count on the fact that He is there. He is love. He is the rock, His works are perfect and all His ways are just.
I still don’t like math, and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. I still cry into my textbook when I’ve spent an hour on the same problem and can’t get the right answer. However, I’m starting to realize that, just like they always taught me in Sunday school, God really can be found in all things.