What Your LDR Teaches You About Valentine's Day

What Your LDR Teaches You About Valentine's Day

It's really just another day (kind of).

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The cynicism about Valentine's Day that never fails to spread every year tends to be attributed to single people who are hating on the lovey dove day that is Valentine's Day. We can all understand why this national day of chocolates, roses, and love can get a bad rap from people who are feeling left out. However, Valentine's Day doesn't only have this effect on people without a significant other. It can also get people in long distance relationships in a funk, too.

Surprisingly I'm actually not here to bash Valentine's Day or defend it either. Instead, I'm here to explain that being in a long distance relationship teaches you a lot about the holiday.

It can be a conflicting feeling knowing that while you DO have someone to be celebrating the day with on a date or over some chocolates, distance is in the way. Often this day just makes the miles feel even longer than they normally do.

However, being in a long distance relationship on this day of love makes you realize just that... that it's really just a day. What is the difference between date or present or flowers on February 14th or February 19th or June 7th? Really nothing.

Missing Valentine's Day due to distance can be a deflating feeling because you know you shouldn't be sad but are still feeling left out in a weird way.

To all those people in long distance relationships not celebrating Valentine's Day in a conventional way this year, don't let it get you down. And don't let it make you envious. Think of Valentine's Day as a mindset rather than a predetermined day. You can recreate all that Valentine's Day is about any day of the year when the miles between you and your significant other are taken out of the equation.

Remember, you're lucky to have someone to be missing no matter how hard it may seem come February 14th.

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If You Don't Respect The Relationships Of Others, It's Clear That You Don't Respect Yourself Either

No person who is truly happy and confident would try to interfere with two people who are happy together.

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To women who knowingly make advances on men in committed relationships,

I understand. You want a relationship. It is simply human nature to crave love and wish to give love in return. However, what I don't understand is looking for love in a person who has already found love in someone else.

You see him being a gentleman and treating the woman he loves with the chivalry she deserves. You can tell how madly in love they are and you can't help but feel jealous, realizing that he has all of the qualities you look for in a man. You can't control your thoughts or feelings.

However, what you can control are your actions. When it comes to interfering with a relationship, you cannot just assume you will not be held accountable for the things you say and do in an attempt to tear two people apart. In a world of 7 billion people, there are no excuses to make advances toward someone in a relationship. None at all.

It does not matter if you've known the person for years. It does not matter if you've dated before, miss the connection you used to have, and are looking to reconnect. It does not matter if you're drunk. Save the heart-eyed emojis and "I love you"s for someone else.

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Flirting with someone fully aware of the fact that that person is in a relationship is flat out disrespectful to all parties involved and will result in one of two outcomes.

Maybe you will get the reaction you want and the man will go behind his girlfriend's back to be with you. Or, if he respects the woman he is with, he will be honest with her and cut you out of his life because of your lack of respect for the relationship.

If the man ends up betraying his girlfriend, you may think you won him over. While this may feel like a victory at first, karma will come back and bite you. It always does.

The way you win him is exactly how you will lose him. If he'll do it to her, he'll do it to you.

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Thankfully, there are men in the world who will stay loyal and refuse to let other women come between them and their significant other. However, the blatant disrespect on your part is still evident, even if the relationship is strong enough to remain unaffected by the drama you cause.

You might think that spilling your undying love to the man you've been crushing on is justified. However, if he is with another woman, it is best to keep those thoughts to yourself, especially if you have any type of friendship or basic respect for either person in the relationship.

Put yourself in the woman's shoes. Would you want another woman, especially an ex or friend, messaging the person you love flirty paragraphs of admiration? If you wouldn't want it sent to your significant other, do not send it to someone else's significant other. It's that simple.

The thing about boundaries is that once they're crossed, it is hard for things to ever go back to the way they were before. Once you show disrespect to a relationship, neither partner will trust you again. Are your impulsive texts worth ruining your reputation and potentially hurting others?

Respect boundaries. Respect others. Respect yourself.

Everyone deserves a happy relationship. If you really respect yourself, you will recognize that nothing healthy or loving can come out of another person's sadness and betrayal.

Sincerely,

The woman who wishes you could have been more considerate before hitting "send"

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