Keep Your Friend Group Small

Keep Your Friend Group Small

You would rather have four quarters who would take a bullet for you than one hundred pennies who are more than likely going to flake on you.
222
views

Yes, you read that title correctly. In this day and age, we are brainwashed from the moment we enter elementary school that there is something wrong with you if you aren't popular. This makes us do stupid things that we normally wouldn't do in order for people to think we are cool. Why do we always seek the approval of others?

I am not saying it is bad if you have a lot of friends.

In fact, kudos to you if you have a lot of friends and are extremely popular because that's hard to pull off. If you are one of the lucky ones that has a lot of friends, make sure they are dependable friends instead of just "friends." You know these so-called "friends." Everyone has had at least one of these "friends" in their lifetime and they know for a fact these people tend to only stay in the friendship when it is convenient for them. Like any relationship, they require effort by both parties for it to work so if one isn't putting the effort in that's usually a sign they aren't in it for the long haul.

The saying is true, the older you get in life, you learn from the mistakes you made when you were younger. I'm 20 now (and for the most part still have no idea what I am doing in life) but I look back to when I was 13-18 and cared about having a lot of friends. I got so stuck on increasing my number of friends and having everyone like me that I blinded myself from the fact that a lot of them used me for the things I could give them.

I would buy my friend's lunch, take them to sporting events, help them with homework, support them when they were down and invite them to concerts, but when I needed a favor in return, I was faced with the cold hard truth that these "friendships" were convenient friendships. I also learned that these so-called "friends" of mine had accused me of things I never did and would get mad if I stood up for myself.

It wasn't until one of my best friends (to this day I might add) asked me one simple question: "Who are you?" She asked me this because she said I was no longer the person she knew who was genuine, brave, independent and happy. Instead, she said I was completely different, trying to be what I thought everyone else wanted me to be. As a people pleaser, I tend to get lost in my friendships sometimes because I want everyone to like me; I try to maintain a perfect image and put in a lot of effort to make the friendship perfect.

This gets old fast!

Believe me, as someone who has had many friends and no friends at all, having just three really good friends is all you need. They are the friends who will come over at 2 a.m. to comfort you, they text you every day to check in on you, you know their family and love them all, you can trust them with your life and they will follow through, and they will stand by your side when you feel like no one else will. These are the rare gems in the world and these are the people you need in your life. They push you to become a better person and remind you that the world isn't as shitty as you may think. You really only need four quarters instead of one hundred pennies. Love these friends fiercely because in today's world, it's hard to find people who care about anyone except themselves.

Cover Image Credit: Alexa Warford

Popular Right Now

50 Things To Be Happy About

It's the little things in life.
19233
views

It is always easier to pick out the negatives in life. We tend to dwell on them and drown out the happy moments. I asked a friend to tell me something that made them happy. They sarcastically laughed at my question then thought about it for a minute. Nothing. But they could easily come up with things that made them unhappy. Then I read them my list, and they were smiling and laughing in agreement the whole time. There are so many more things to be happy and laugh about than we realize. After all- it's the little things in life that can mean the most! Here are 50 things that make me happy. What are your 50?

  1. The first warm day of the year
  2. Laughing so hard your abs ache
  3. Freshly washed sheets
  4. Looking through old pictures
  5. The smell of a coffee shop
  6. Eating cookie dough
  7. Reading a bible verse that perfectly fits your current situation
  8. Seeing someone open a gift you got them
  9. Eating birthday cake
  10. A shower after a long day
  11. Marking something off your to-do list
  12. Drinking ice cold water on a really hot day
  13. Dressing up for no reason
  14. Breakfast food
  15. Being able to lay in bed in the morning
  16. Finding something you love at the store
  17. And it’s on sale
  18. Cute elderly couples
  19. When a stranger compliments you
  20. Getting butterflies in your stomach
  21. Taking a nap
  22. Cooking something delicious
  23. Being lost for words
  24. Receiving a birthday card in the mail
  25. And there's money in it
  26. Finally cleaning your room
  27. Realizing how fortunate you are
  28. Waking up from a nightmare and realizing it wasn't real
  29. Fresh fruit
  30. Walking barefoot in the grass
  31. Singing along to a song in the car
  32. Sunrises
  33. Sunsets
  34. Freshly baked cookies with a glass of milk
  35. Summertime cookouts
  36. Feeling pretty
  37. Looking forward to something
  38. Lemonade
  39. Comfortable silences
  40. Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you have more time to sleep
  41. Surviving another school year
  42. The cold side of the pillow
  43. The smell of popcorn
  44. Remembering something funny that happened
  45. Laughing to yourself about it
  46. Feeling weird about laughing to yourself
  47. Printed photographs
  48. Wearing a new outfit
  49. The sound of an ice cream truck
  50. Feeling confident
Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

My Eating Disorder Was A Secret, Even From Me

No one ever talks about it, and if they had my life might be different.

120
views

I remember ninth grade health class very well, specifically one day in particular. The day we talked about eating disorders, I was ready to hear about anorexia and bulimia. I was not ready to walk out of that classroom with confirmation that I had an eating disorder, but that is exactly what I did that day.

After speaking on anorexia and bulimia, my teacher told us about Binge Eating Disorder.

My 14-year-old ears perked up. I had never heard of this disease, but I was immediately interested. I knew anorexia and bulimia well, they were the diseases that, at the time, I wish I had the determination to try, but I was too scared to hurt my body.

Binge Eating Disorder was new to me. My teacher described it as continuing to eat after you were full and eating for hours at a time. As the signs and symptoms continued to be read, I realized... that the last three years of my life had been plagued by binges. There was a lot I couldn't control in my life, but eating was one thing that I always had control over. It was the one thing that always brought me comfort.

Most binges would start after I came home from a hard day at school, or maybe after I got in a fight with a family member. Maybe I felt insecure about the growing number on the scale, but I ate.

It always started with half a bag of chips, then maybe a cookie or other sweet treat, and then I would finish with something else I could find in the pantry. My mother would come home and begin making dinner.

Ashamed, I would hide the food anywhere so my family could not tell I had been eating and then I would go eat dinner.

This was a common occurrence for me, but I had no idea that my habits were wrong or should point to an eating disorder. The only thing that I knew was wrong with me, was that I was gaining weight.

For the longest time, I thought an eating disorder was something that helped you lose weight unhealthily, not gain weight. It wasn't until I sat in a health class that I realized that there was anything wrong with me.

Education is so important in overcoming eating disorders. We are making such great strides about informing people about the dangers of eating disorders and positive body image.

It is so important that we start making Binge Eating Disorder a topic that is as known as anorexia and bulimia. No one ever discusses Binge Eating Disorder, not even the dangers of it, maybe if they had my life might have been different.

Maybe I would have found out about it earlier and could have gotten help before it got out of hand.

I wish I could say that I left that health class that day and never had a binge again. The truth is I binged several times after that, and still to this day I have an episode, although they are very rare.

It would be unrealistic to tell you that I overcame my eating disorder that day because it is a journey I am still completing. Every day presents a new challenge, and sometimes I fail, but I will succeed, and succeeding is worth a few failures.

Related Content

Facebook Comments