A structure is safe. It provides us with security, something to hold onto when uncertainty hides around every corner. When I was younger, the thought of spontaneity and unstructured events sent my brain into a spiral of panic.
Constantly, I overanalyzed all the possible outcomes that could result from an unfamiliar occurrence. Tests, confrontation, and how other people viewed me were main culprits of my anxiety.
For this reason, I despised change and saw it as an unwelcome nuisance.
After a while, I learned to embrace change and the excitement it contains. The transition to a more laidback version of myself was far from easy. After some time though, I learned that no matter how much you plan for your life, you can never control all outside variables.
Much like a thunderstorm can roll around and wreck your beach day, unexpected factors can roll around and wreck your plans for the future. Interestingly enough, I used to be absolutely terrified of thunderstorms.
For years, I hid in the basement every time a crack of thunder boomed through the air and bought all kinds of books that explained weather phenomenon. I thought that the more I knew, the less uncertainty there would be.
Every once and awhile, a nasty supercell would roll in out of the blue. I retreated back to the safety of the basement equipped with flashlights and snacks. In such moments, I wondered why I spent so much focus on phenomena I could not predict.
Today, I am fascinated by lightning, thunder, clouds, and the like. I prefer a front row view when the weather takes a turn for the worse. I can usually be found sitting by the window until the craziness passes. Likewise, I have embraced spontaneity.
Now, a structure is abnormal to me. Maybe this is because I have learned to thrive off the unexpected. I find joy in going on random adventures with my friends, exploring off the path when I go for a hike, trying something new on the menu and making friends in the most uncommon places. I make split decisions to go outside to watch the sunset or run a 5k.
When you view uncertainty as a positive thing, life becomes much less terrifying and quite a bit more thrilling.
Life hits us with curve balls we would never be able to see coming. Not all of these curve balls allow for an optimistic outlook. Sometimes life gets really horribly hard for no reason at all. The important thing is that we never lose that childlike wonder that causes us to keep seeking exhilaration.
A rainy day is an opportunity to jump in puddles. A missed connection opens the door for new connections; ones that will often benefit us more than those we missed. We cannot tell how much a person or moment will mean to us at first. We must trust that there will be better days with better opportunities ahead of us. Too rigid of a structure in life seems to only set people up for disappointment.
Goals and plans are crucial to success, but the ability to adapt, and smile through the cracks in our plans is crucial to happiness. If I’ve learned one thing in the past 19 years of my life, it’s that success is much easier to come by when we are happy.
Spark your curiosity.
Say yes to the random plans your friends make on Tuesday night to take a quick study break and explore your city. Take a class that may not relate to your major but fascinates you. Study abroad, decide to train for a marathon, make a last minute choice to visit your friends. Leave more room in your life for excitement. That might leave less certainty in your schedule, but life will break that schedule anyway.
Spontaneity leaves you with the power to break it yourself.
Take a front seat to the thunderstorm. You can overanalyze your fears and avoid them, or you can act on a whim sometimes, confront what scares you, and live a little bigger. Living a little bigger allows you to shine a little brighter.
Stop taking life so seriously and focusing on what you cannot change. Instead, chase your storms and focus on what thrills you.