Every year, as October 5 starts getting closer, I start looking for the perfect gift for the most important person in my life. I know her favorite color, her favorite flower, and her favorite stores, so it is usually very quick and easy to find something she will love.
However, this year was a little different. I kept putting it off to the side because I had to study for a test, had an essay to write, or I was just too tired. Day after day would go by where I just couldn't take 20 minutes out of my day to look for a simple gift.
I would make any type of excuse so that I wouldn't even have to think about it. I didn't understand why it was so hard for me until it was the day before her birthday, and I was forced to finally sit down and find something.
I started typing the usual "what to get mom for birthday" and scrolled through countless pages of jewelry, embroideries, picture frames, and clothing items. Any of these would've been perfect, but it bothered me that I couldn't picture her reaction. And that's when it finally hit me: I wasn't going to be there to give her the gift personally.
This was my first year being away from home and the first year I wouldn't be there for her birthday. It wasn't the gift that was important to her, it was being able to share her special day with her loved ones. Picturing my mom being upset on her birthday was too overwhelming for me to think about, so I didn't. I didn't want to admit to myself that I really missed my mom.
The relationship between my mom and I hasn't always been easy. She has always been very strict and many times we didn't see eye to eye. I inherited her attitude and it always caused many arguments when I was a teenager. As the years passed and I matured, I began to see why she had been so strict with me.
No, she wasn't trying to ruin my life like I had always believed, she was actually just trying to protect me.
As I got older, the failures and mistakes I made began showing me that no one was born with an instruction manual. And believe it or not, there is no "right way" of raising a child. I wish I could go back to the times where I was mad at my parents and instead tell them how much I loved them, and I wish it hadn't taken me so long to appreciate them.
To the college kids who miss their parents: call them, they miss you just as much as you miss them.
To the parents who think their kids in college don't miss them: they do, they love you and they are thankful.
To the person I thank God for every day, my mom: Te quiero mucho!
I wouldn't be the person I am today without her guidance and unconditional love. I wouldn't be here without her support and hard work. She is my role model, my guardian angel and all I can hope for is to one day be able to give her the whole world because she deserves nothing less than that.