Many of my mornings during senior year were spent in the library. I was either cramming for a test I had an hour later or I was talking amongst my fellow classmates about how crazy it was that we were graduating.
There were moments where I would be sitting with my peers as they would talk among themselves about their exciting journeys of heading off to the college of their dreams. Dreams varied from Yale, Princeton, and Harvard to dreams of staying home and going to the University of Missouri or Columbia College.
While I supported my peers' future endeavors, my heart sunk a little deeper each time someone would mention their plans about moving on to the most amazing phase of their life at a university. The reason why my heart felt so alone in this was that I wouldn't be attaining the same college experience that they would. I was going to a community college.
I remember feeling so small in those conversations.
I had not realized the truth that it was okay to go to a community college after high school. While I was told that it was the cheaper decision, I still felt the stigma of going to a community college hitting me everywhere I went. One of my biggest insecurities that have circled throughout my life is the lie that I'm not good enough.
That insecurity stuck out like a thorn in my side throughout the process of accepting the fact that I was going to spend the first two years after graduation at a community college. I felt unworthy to be in college. My efforts wouldn't be matched at such a small institution. Everyone around me was achieving higher goals than me. I just did not feel like I was enough.
I had heard so many people say, "Oh I just go to a community college." They say it with such remorse and disgust, like it was such a terrible thing to choose to not go to a university after high school. Before I even experienced community college myself, I was already submerged in a pool of negative remarks.
If you're someone that is currently enrolled in a community college or is contemplating going to one, let me remind you of these truths:
1. You are enough.
Just because you aren't living your life like your other peers doesn't mean you are any less than them.
2. You are still getting a quality education.
Do not dismiss that! There are teachers just as life-giving as teachers at higher universities and sometimes they're even better.
3. Think of the community!
You'll get to ease into college so much easier than your peers. You'll be able to become more comfortable with visiting your professors during their office hours. This will be the beginning of building relationships with your teachers.
4. You will be so incredibly thankful for making this financial decision.
When you begin the next season of your life at a university, you will be so glad you aren't already 5 feet in the debt pool! (Amen)
5. And finally, you're going to be amazing at whatever you do because God has you, one step at a time.
Even if that means taking these first two years slow on the track of college.