It's Not That Black And White These Days

It's Not That Black And White These Days

Cheers to the gray area.
10
views

When asked if he liked a girl, my friend’s response was, “it’s not that black and white these days, is it?” I was surprised, yet somewhat intrigued and pleased at his answer. Prior to this conversation, I’d only ever seen it two ways: yes or no. You either like someone or you don’t. Put in the effort or walk away. So his question really got me thinking.

It made me realize that I’ve been wrong this entire time. Sure, for some it may be as easy as a yes or no, but in the age of dating apps and the hookup culture, it’s really not as simple as it used to be. Now, there’s this gray space that’s confusing and stressing us and making our lives so much more difficult. Within that space lies so many variables and questions.

Maybe you like spending time with someone, and you know you’re definitely more than just friends, but does that necessarily mean that you like him or her? I’d argue no. In my eyes, enjoying your time with someone is solely about enjoying their company and interests, and maybe even their personality. However, liking someone is about wanting to get to know the person on a deeper level and appreciating who they are as an individual. While the former can surely lead to the latter, it’s intrigue and curiosity that are driving factors of liking someone, and those are what I believe mark the true difference between the two.

I’m not quite sure what my intent is in writing this article. I suppose this is more food for thought and my take on the matter rather than anything else. You might agree or disagree, and that’s fine. Again, it’s just my opinion, so don’t take it too personally or seriously.

I know I’m not the only one that’s been confused before by someone else’s signals and intentions. But prior to having that conversation with my friend, it never really hit me that I’ve been living in this gray area for some time now. Honestly, I think I’m okay with being in the middle… for now. Until you find that one person that continues to peak your interest and draw your attention, live in the gray area! There’s nothing wrong with it. In fact, sometimes it’s just what we need.

Cover Image Credit: icytales.com

Popular Right Now

36 Reasons Why You Should Date a Harry Potter Fan

Dating a Potterhead's like catching the Golden Snitch
1701
views

Who are the best people in the entire world? Potterheads. They're passionate about the Wizarding World, and they're bound to be just as passionate about you. Falling in love with a Harry Potter fan is effortless, and there are simply countless reasons why.


1. You’ll always know what to get them for Christmas. Or their birthday. Or literally any holiday.


You can never have too many butterbeer mugs.




2. They won’t judge anyone based on a first impression.


Because we know everyone changes, for better or worse.




3. They’re super cheeky.



4. And also pretty sassy.


In a good way, of course.




5. They fully understand how powerful love is.




6. Because it can literally save lives.


7. They will be loyal to you until the very end.


8. They’ll always have that innocent, childlike wonder.



9. They’re probably a funny pick-up line expert.



10. They have no problem standing up for themselves, or for you.



11. They’re straightforward.


Because sometimes you need to hear something even if you don't want to.




12. They know you can have a family you’re born with and also a family that you choose, and they appreciate them both.



13. They're also very protective of said families.



14. They know that sometimes love requires immense sacrifice.



15. They read. A lot.


Odds are they might become your own personal library.




16. They’re courageous, smart, honest, and ambitious.


And they'll probably be able to sort you into a house, too.




17. They know what heartbreak feels like, and know how to bounce back stronger.



18. They laugh a whole lot.



19. They will go to the ends of the world and back to protect the people they love, and never give up on those people.



20. They will appreciate the love you show them and will not take your relationship for granted.




21. They know that the best things (and people) in life are worth waiting for.



22. They’re all for those cozy nights in.


Reading is great but if you want to watch a movie they'll have eight perfect viewing options at the ready.




23. They know that life is finite. So prepare for lots of spontaneous adventures.


24. It's not that hard to make them smile.



25. They're probably a great dancer.



26. They don’t do jealousy. Ever.


Every time jealousy came into play in Harry Potter, something crumbled. Believe me, we know better.




27. They're super passionate.



28. If you lose anything important, "those damn Nargles" is a legitimate excuse.


29. They're really patient.






30. They don't let anyone boss them around.




31. They're quite optimistic.


32. They're definitely not afraid to goof around.



33. If you’re getting serious, there’s no need to be worried about figuring out where and/or how they want to be proposed to.


And at your wedding you probably won't say "I do," you'll make the Unbreakable Vow.


34. They're probably a great kisser.


35. They'll always be there for you.


36. The most romantic thing you could say to them is literally one word.


Trust me on this one.

Cover Image Credit: hdwallpapers

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

8 Hacks For Making Long Distance More Bearable, From The Girl Who's Made It Work

Long-distance relationships are hard, but not impossible.

388
views

There are hardships that come along with being apart from the person you love, but making it work can be just as rewarding. Long distance is never easy, but it does not have to be all bad...

1. Make time for each other

Especially when in a long-distance relationship, it is important to take time out of your day to remind your significant other that you care and are interested in what they are doing on a day to day basis. Even if you can't be together physically, it's important to be there for each other emotionally.

2. Trust your partner

Not seeing your partner can be hard, especially if you have trust issues going on in your relationship. It is important that you trust your partner 100%, so you are not always worrying about what they are doing when they are not texting you back.

3. Phone calls

Sometimes a bad day can be turned around simply by hearing your partners voice, sometimes texting gets old and a good ol' fashioned phone call can make all of the difference. Whenever I am feeling down, it always helps to call and talk things out, so I do not feel so alone.

4. Visit each other

Depending on the distance between you and your partner, visiting each other during breaks or whenever you have time can make things not feel so "weird" if you have been away from each other for a long time. My boyfriend and I live 2 1/2 hours away and we would take turns visiting each other. Not seeing each other for a couple of weeks, or months and then seeing each other again is a feeling I cannot describe. It makes you feel like everything you are doing is worth it, but it is important that visits are both sided, and one is not flying/driving to the other more.

5. Effort

The relationship will not work unless you want it too, and effort is key in this situation. One-sided relationships will never work, and will often leave the other person dissatisfied in the relationship. Initiation for visits, phone calls or even a simple text message being constantly from one partner is not fair and shows a lack of effort from the other person. If you care about someone you should want to do anything you can to reassure them that you care.

6. Don't obsess

It is easy to start obsessing about constantly talking to your partner and always being around to talk when they are free, but you need to make sure you do not start to lose yourself. Things could be amazing when you are together, but when you have to be apart it is important to stay busy and have relationships with other people in your life. It is easy to just want to sit in your room and talk to your significant other all day, but you need to live your life the way you normally would. Otherwise, what would you really have to talk about at the end of the night?

7. Cherish the time you have together

Finally seeing your significant other after extended periods of time can be bittersweet. The initial excitement can fade away when reality sets in and you know you will be a part in the next few days or weeks. Don't dwell on the fact that you will be apart again, but instead make the most out of every moment you have together. Utilize the fact one of you is in a new place and take these opportunities to make new memories and do new things together. Make each visit better than the last, yes it is sad it can't always be this way, but you have to make the most out of every situation.

8. What will be, will be

If the relationship is meant to work out it will, and if it is not that is OK. Do not force anything to try to drag a relationship along, if signs of distance are being shown from your partner, do not become blind to them and ignore it. Long distance is not for everyone and can become too much for some people, you have to understand it is not you that is the problem. As I said, what will be, will be and there is nothing you can really do besides put your all into the relationship.

I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years and a majority of our relationship has been long distance. I swore to myself I would never go into a long-distance relationship, but sometimes when you meet the right person it is all worth it. These eight tips have helped me in my relationship, not feel so alone, and keep my relationship happy and healthy.

Related Content

Facebook Comments