At the beginning of my first year of college, a friend of mine was telling me about her friend that was afraid to fly in an airplane. My friend then said that this girl did not have enough faith in God to keep her safe. God tells us not to worry, and anxiety includes but is not limited to worry. So is anxiety a sin? There are people on both sides of the spectrum. Some seem to believe that worrying and having anxiety is morally wrong for a Christian. Others see anxiety as an uncontrollable mental condition or emotion. So how should a Christian approach the subject?
First, let's look at why anxiety could be considered sinful. In the book of Matthew, we are commanded to not worry because God will provide for all of our needs. Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." And again, we as Christians are told to "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
So am I sinning against God when I worry or start to feel panicky? Are these commands from God warning me not to sin or are they encouraging me to trust God instead of myself? But that brings us to the issue of trust. Proverbs 3:5 warns, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." I'll be the first to admit that I need to trust and love God more and surrender to His will more regularly. I believe it is a sin to lean on your own understanding and not acknowledge God in one's life. So does this include my struggle with anxiety? I just don't know.
As a person who struggles with anxiety, I can't imagine a loving God being angry or disappointed with me as I struggle to breathe and fight my own terror, trying my best to give it to God. Maybe God was disappointed in me as I had my first (and hopefully last) full-fledged panic attack. As I tried to regulate my breathing through the oxygen mask on my face and looked into my mom's eyes pleadingly, I prayed to God, feeling shame for my own panic. I felt embarrassed and guilty. I was sorry that I was wasting these people's time with my anxiety and I was sorry that I didn't trust God more. I only hope that God was not disappointed in me as I apologized to Him and those around me for the inconvenience and my lack of trust.
I hope that God is not angry with me for having the anxieties that He encourages me to cast on Him because He cares for me. If having anxiety is a sin, then I am guilty. And if I am guilty, I am thankful for the grace and forgiveness He extends. I don't know if anxiety is morally wrong, but I shudder to think that the God who says "Do not fear, for I am with you... I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" would push me away with that same hand because of my fear (Isaiah 41:10).
