As a freshman in college, you are full of adrenaline. Leaving your home and being on your own is your first taste of freedom, and your first opportunity to do as you please without someone watching over your shoulder. You truly have an opportunity to be whatever and be with whoever you desire. But if you have a close relationship with your family like I do, watching them leave for the first time is heartbreaking. I remember crying as my family left because I knew it would be anywhere from six months to a year before I saw them again.
However, after about 10 minutes of crying I would watch TV or eat a pint of ice cream or go socialize with my hallmates, and my sadness was quickly washed away with the excitement of new opportunities. It is easier as a freshman to distract yourself from your homesickness if you get involved or do things that make you happy. In all honesty, as a freshman in college, you are more self-involved. Being away from home is an opportunity to focus on you and what you want, and not worry about anyone else.
The deeper into college I become, the more I realize just how self-involved I was and that now as a junior, I miss home more than ever before. The more adulting I do, or the closer I get to accomplishing my goals in life, the more I realize just how important it is to me to have my family by my side through it all. When I was younger, they were my idols, my confidants. Although they are still, it's much different when the closest you can get to them is a phone call.
Of course, missing them only makes me work harder, as getting good grades will allow me to attend graduate school where I please and move closer to my family, but it also makes focusing more difficult. Spending 16 hours in the library makes me realize that time passes by so fast and that tomorrow is never promised. At the end of the day, which will matter more, an A on my exam or the time spent making memories or connecting with the people I love? Of course in life, you have to learn to balance both, and as a junior, I will say that my ability to do so has increased.
But still, in the long run, I miss my family. I miss being able to eat whole tubs of hummus and drink whole carafes of tea or coffee with my mom. I miss the car rides of belting out classic tunes with my brother, or the endless life talks or fashion decisions and trials with my sister. I miss waking up to the smell of breakfast or watching my dad play video games early in the morning before anyone else in my family wakes up. These little moments are some of the things I miss dearly, and I cherish them every day. The older I become, the more I appreciate just how lucky I am to be surrounded by the people that I am. Although I may miss them dearly, I know they are rooting for me from different places in the world, and until I can see them again, ill hold on to that as tightly as I can.