To The Fellow Sufferers of Impostor Syndrome, I Feel You

To The Fellow Sufferers of Impostor Syndrome, I Feel You

Trust me, you're not a fraud.

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Did my insecurities and anxieties begin at UCLA? No. Were they intensified by my incessant need to compare myself to others only to convince myself that I was somehow subpar in comparison? Yes.

High school was my comfort zone, however, life at the #1 Public University in the United States is a completely different experience. Throughout my first few weeks at UCLA, I've questioned my major, my life's purpose, and my abilities but my darkest moments have been spent questioning whether or not I truly belong at UCLA.

My own narrative is one of constant comparison and inferiority. As my classmates laugh off a lecture as a review, I condemn myself for not thinking the same way. I wonder why I don't have the expertise that they have, and why my successes feel small in comparison to theirs. It all feels like a front; deep down I know I've satisfied the level of accomplishment it takes to get to UCLA, but when my peers seem so far ahead of me academically, socially, and in all other "lys" it feels as if "faking it 'til I make it" has become a permanent means of survival.

This experience is not uncommon. First described by psychologists Suzanne Imes and Pauline Rose Clance in the 1970s, "impostor syndrome occurs among high achievers who are unable to internalize and accept their success." Students who suffer from impostor syndrome, "often attribute their accomplishments to luck rather than ability, and fear that others will eventually unmask them as a fraud."

I asked my friends about their experiences with impostor syndrome to confirm my suspicion that it's a condition suffered by many.

In a conversation in my lounge, my floormates admitted that their midterm scores indicated that their days of over-achieving are long gone-- at UCLA, they're now "average" or even "below average."

Their impostor syndrome is the barrier that keeps them from raising their hand in lecture, talking in a discussion, and truly having confidence in their own ideas.

This isn't limited to just academics though; my friend confessed to me that "ASB and Dance defined her in high school." After being rejected from both of the University equivalents, she questions if she was even a leader or a dancer in the first place.

Even in her third year, my friend still questions if she belongs at UCLA. Her experience is unique in that she fears her lack of stress and getting good grades is a false representation of her intelligence because she's in a traditionally "easy" major.

This article doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of all cases of impostor syndrome at UCLA, but what's for certain is that impostor syndrome is rooted in constantly comparing oneself to others. The easiest way to minimize its effects on your life? Accept it.

My floormate said it best: "Impostor syndrome never goes away. You just learn to stop comparing yourself to other people."

Going forward, I pledge to accept that people come from different walks of life than I do. I have a responsibility to learn, grow, cater to my weaknesses, and recognize my strengths; this is no way related to other people's standards. I will dismantle the "hush hush" culture that surrounds impostor syndrome and will always be there to remind not only myself but everyone around me that they belong at UCLA.

For us, it's not a matter of luck. We've earned our opportunities through nothing less than hard work and perseverance.

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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Wearing Sneakers To The Gym Just Isn't Going To Cut It These Days

Going to the gym is more than just working out its about having the right gadgets and outfits to go with it.

rtufaro
rtufaro
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I am an advocate of making sure you sweat once a day, I love going to the gym. I blast my music, feel my muscles fatiuging, and sweat it out. As I have been going to the gym more I have noticed that people's outfits to the gym are more than just your average t-shirt and leggings people wear multicolored and matching attire and are geared up with their Apple airpods and watches.

I personally go with an old T-shirt and throw on my freshly washed leggings and my running shoes and I am ready to go, but I see how dressing in the full work out attire has a positive impact on your gym session. Feeling fully motivated in your new matching gym getup is important as you will want to work out harder and push yourself being that you are fully in the right gear. As I progress in attending the gym I want to get an Apple watch and track my data.

It is important to move your body for at least once an hour a day and by going to the gym you are ensuring this movement. Eating right also puts you on track and if you are working out and eating right you will surely soon see your hard work. NoIt doesn't matter what you wear to the gym as long as you are there your making progress. It is important however to stay motivated because in order to get anything out of the gym you have to participate and in doing so wearing a cute gym out fit will only make this better.

rtufaro
rtufaro

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