My friends recently brought it to my attention that I am slightly cold hearted. I guess they're right. You kind of have to be cold hearted to disinvite your date to prom just because they "like-like" you. I mean, I just really don't vibe on emotions or feelings. So, as I reflect on my life, here are seven things that I have found to be true when your heart is as icy as mine:

1. Best friends are the only ones exempt from cold heartedness.

Let's be honest, these are the few people you love more than a fresh bowl of mac and cheese.

2. Food is always the answer.

When a best friend is broken hearted, the most thoughtful thing you can think of to do is buy them a pizza.

3. Flirting is not a thing.

My own mother laughed in my face at the prospect of me trying to flirt -- so why bother, right?

4. Relationships?

Non-existent -- like my heart.

5. I am a master of the silent treatment.

Not speaking means not dealing with feelings and fighting like an adult --which sounds pretty great to me -- and my freezing heart

6. Everyone assumes you want to be alone.

But, for real -- this is mostly true. It means you don't have to share your feelings or anyone else's. It's just you, your mac and cheese, and Netflix.

7. Sadly, you cannot avoid feelings 100 percent of the time.

Rare occasions come around when, all of a sudden, you feel something and you don't know what. It's very uncomfortable and almost painful, as if someone was stealing all of your beloved mac and cheese and there is nothing you can do about it.

So, yeah, I'll be in the tundra with my frozen heart if you need me.