If Love Is A Game, I Don't Want To Play

Our Generation Won't Have Timeless Love Stories To Tell If We Keep Pursuing Relationships Like A Game

Our generation sucks at love and I'm sure our grandparents would agree.

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Our generation has seemed to have made love a game. Ghosting has become the new norm to avoid actually communicating feelings, or lack thereof.

If you meet someone, you have to try and read their signals to determine whether they want to just hook-up, or if they may want something more. It's evolved into sitting on your phone, not wanting to text the person first because you don't want to give them the power to leave you on "read."

It's become pretending to be okay waiting until the weekend to see each other because you are too "busy" during the week to actually hang out.

Relationships shouldn't be fearing that you'll be dropped without an explanation because something better comes along. I understand that not all relationships are destined to work out for whatever reason, but what happened to respect and communicating what is going on like adults rather than opting for "ghosting?"

Relationships should be built on making sure the people involved feel like a priority. I get it, we are college students and have a million things going on, but we shouldn't be left feeling like a convenience –– but being told otherwise. Actions speak louder than words and empty promises. Either be sure that you are going to live up to what you say, or don't say anything at all.

In my opinion, a relationship shouldn't only revolve around sex. If that's what we wanted we would all just resort to one night stands, FWB and Tinder. Screw "Netflix and chill" all the damn time, what happened to dates and spending time together without always being intimate?

If your intentions aren't for the right reasons, then why try to pursue someone?

Maybe my perspective on relationships is dated and old school, but I don't think there is anything wrong with that. I hear and read about how so many people of our generation express their grandparents' relationships as "goals" and that's because they didn't play the games we play today.

They wrote letters, spoke on the phone, and couldn't rely on social media to subtly creep or hint that they were interested– they made it known. They communicated. They pursued.

Most importantly, they were willing to put in the work. They didn't let things get in the way or be a reason to put a pause on the relationship. My grandparents' relationship survived a war for goodness sake. They didn't have the conveniences we have today to keep tabs on the people they cared about. If they were curious, they had to reach out. They had to make moves and be fearless when it came to relationships and love.

There's a reason we all love "The Notebook." Noah made it known to Aly that he wanted to take her on a date, hell he even climbed a damn Ferris wheel to ask her out. He then went onto building a dream home for her, from the ground up to represent he wanted to be with her, like swoon. Not saying it has to be that extreme, but asking someone to hang out shouldn't always be a "Wanna chill?" text, or even worse, a Snapchat.

Relationships should consist of communication, consistency, honesty, and genuineness. We shouldn't settle for anything less.

Luckily for me, I'm not desperate for a relationship. I don't see the point in trying to make it work with someone that won't put in the same effort. I'm happy being single, and I'm more than happy staying patient until I meet someone that will reciprocate feelings and make a relationship work, and not feel like a game.

Cover Image Credit:

Photo by Caleb Ekeroth on Unsplash

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Why You Should Stop Chasing Him

You deserve better.
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They say “the thrill of the chase" makes someone more enticing. There's just something about wanting something you can't have that drives you crazy (in a good way). There is never a dull moment. Pursuing him is a challenge. Nothing comes easily. What's the fun in that anyway?

I'm going to tell you this: stop chasing him. Stop forgiving him when he forgets to answer your text messages and phone calls. Stop being the one to always make plans. Stop letting him bail on you. Stop waiting around for him. Stop being lied to. Stop making excuses when he doesn't make time for you. There is a difference between someone who is “hard to get" and a flat out jerk who doesn't give you the time of day. Stop letting him use you.

You deserve to be with someone who makes you fall asleep every night in the middle of texting him because neither of you want the conversation to end. You deserve someone who plans dates for the two of you. You deserve someone who asks you to hang out before midnight. You deserve someone who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do with them. You deserve someone who insists on paying for your ice cream. You deserve someone who won't deceive you. You deserve someone who is straightforward. You deserve attention. You deserve affection. You deserve a partnership that is mutual, not one-sided. You deserve to be chased.

You are better than 3 a.m. “Hey" texts. You are better than a night spent watching a movie just to fool around. You are better than trying to decode his vague messages. You are better than his shadiness. You are better than mind games. You are better than being ignored.

If you have to chase him, he's not worth it. Don't settle for someone who makes you beg for his attention. If he is genuinely interested in getting to know you, he will put in the effort. A relationship where your feelings are reciprocated is far more rewarding than one where you constantly feel like you have to drag him along.

Change your mentality. Become more independent. Be confident, be bold. Find happiness in being alone. Don't waste your time pathetically chasing after someone who doesn't feel the same, but doesn't have the heart or the courage to tell you so. Your self-confidence and positivity will make you radiant, and eventually, you will attract the kind of guy who is mature enough to not mess with your head.

Cover Image Credit: weheartit.com

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12 You Should Know About Your Significant Other After You've Been Dating 12 Months Or More

You have multiple food orders memorized.

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Dating someone for a year+ means that you are bound to know things you might not have known in the early months of the relationship. You also might act differently than you did at the beginning of the relationship.

Here are 12 things you know when you've been dating for over a year.

1. Clothing size, shoe size

This one you can probably be able to figure out early in the relationship. But, you start to keep in the back of your mind and think of that person when you see clothes or a pair of shoes they might like.

2. You can guess what they are going to text back

Especially if it is just a casual conversation about nothing in particular. You know their go-to responses.

3. You have multiple food orders memorized

Their food orders, of course.

4. You have that one TV show you can put on and neither of you will complain

And that is "The Office."

5. You don't get jealous

How could you have lasted in a relationship for over a year and not have any trust?

6. You know likes and dislikes

And can assume if they are going to like or dislike something.

7. You got a LONG Snapstreak

474 day streak over here.

8. Their successes make you just as happy as it makes them

Seeing your significant other do well and accomplish something great is just as rewarding as if you had done the same.

9. Your friends are his friends and his friends are your friends

And you can all hang out together.

10. You have your favorite restaurants

That we always end up going to.

11. You've met everyone in the family and extended family

And you feel like part of the family.

12. You know extremely personal things about each other

That you would not necessarily share with the public.

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