Our generation has seemed to have made love a game. Ghosting has become the new norm to avoid actually communicating feelings, or lack thereof.
If you meet someone, you have to try and read their signals to determine whether they want to just hook-up, or if they may want something more. It's evolved into sitting on your phone, not wanting to text the person first because you don't want to give them the power to leave you on "read."
It's become pretending to be okay waiting until the weekend to see each other because you are too "busy" during the week to actually hang out.
Relationships shouldn't be fearing that you'll be dropped without an explanation because something better comes along. I understand that not all relationships are destined to work out for whatever reason, but what happened to respect and communicating what is going on like adults rather than opting for "ghosting?"
Relationships should be built on making sure the people involved feel like a priority. I get it, we are college students and have a million things going on, but we shouldn't be left feeling like a convenience –– but being told otherwise. Actions speak louder than words and empty promises. Either be sure that you are going to live up to what you say, or don't say anything at all.
In my opinion, a relationship shouldn't only revolve around sex. If that's what we wanted we would all just resort to one night stands, FWB and Tinder. Screw "Netflix and chill" all the damn time, what happened to dates and spending time together without always being intimate?
If your intentions aren't for the right reasons, then why try to pursue someone?
Maybe my perspective on relationships is dated and old school, but I don't think there is anything wrong with that. I hear and read about how so many people of our generation express their grandparents' relationships as "goals" and that's because they didn't play the games we play today.
They wrote letters, spoke on the phone, and couldn't rely on social media to subtly creep or hint that they were interested– they made it known. They communicated. They pursued.
Most importantly, they were willing to put in the work. They didn't let things get in the way or be a reason to put a pause on the relationship. My grandparents' relationship survived a war for goodness sake. They didn't have the conveniences we have today to keep tabs on the people they cared about. If they were curious, they had to reach out. They had to make moves and be fearless when it came to relationships and love.
There's a reason we all love "The Notebook." Noah made it known to Aly that he wanted to take her on a date, hell he even climbed a damn Ferris wheel to ask her out. He then went onto building a dream home for her, from the ground up to represent he wanted to be with her, like swoon. Not saying it has to be that extreme, but asking someone to hang out shouldn't always be a "Wanna chill?" text, or even worse, a Snapchat.
Relationships should consist of communication, consistency, honesty, and genuineness. We shouldn't settle for anything less.
Luckily for me, I'm not desperate for a relationship. I don't see the point in trying to make it work with someone that won't put in the same effort. I'm happy being single, and I'm more than happy staying patient until I meet someone that will reciprocate feelings and make a relationship work, and not feel like a game.