Everyone Is Getting Engaged Or Having Kids And I Can't Even Keep A Succulent Alive

Everyone Is Getting Engaged Or Having Kids And I Can't Even Keep A Succulent Alive

The succulent is a metaphor for how my life is going.


As a bored freshman in college, I decided that my un-zesty life needed some spicing up. Walking through 'Trader Joe's' on Spring Sunday morning, my heart was pulled towards a plump and stubby succulent. It wasn't the prettiest or the best, but I knew then and there that we were a match made in heaven.

Now, I started college off living in New Mexico, a dry and desolate land where my sadness and boredom was only combated by this single, unwaterable plant (named Oliver).

We were buds. Homies. And I was determined to make the most out of our relationship for as long as possible. I had never owned anything alive all by myself before. This was what adulthood really felt like and I liked to think that I was responsible for his livelihood.

However, after a few more months of the hell that was freshman year, I decided to get out of New Mexico and go on a college exchange program to North Carolina, far, far away from home and my devil of a roommate. So I packed everything in my tiny 2002 Hyundai Santa Fe and drove across the country with my dad for sophomore year. Oliver survived the 3-day drive in the cup holder, being watered by lukewarm water from a plastic water bottle and living his best life.

Long story short, Oliver the succulent made it through the traumatic move (as did I) and we settled into our new home for the next year.

But everything was not okay.

My mental health quickly deteriorated and taking care of myself, much less Oliver, fell to the wayside. Every once in a while I would remember to water him, but it was few and far between- and it was showing. His once luscious and plump, green leaves were now yellow and withered. I had neglected him for so long that it was almost to the point of no return.

But one day, in my deprived and diseased brain, I thought it would be a great idea to chop off his roots. CHOP. OFF. THE. ROOTS. I had had this plant for longer than a year, but in one moment of stupidity, I ruined everything. In my head, the roots were the problem, and I was not going to let Oliver the succulent die, after all, we'd been through.

He'd gone through a weed-infested dorm room, multiple drives across the entirety of New Mexico, a cross-country road trip to North Carolina, a cramped, non-ventilated room with a girl who couldn't ever remember when she watered him, and a few drops to the floor.

However, after 2 weeks of the root-less succulent shoved back into dirt drier than my elbows, I knew that our time together was done and I had to let him go.

I know this is probably the weirdest story (albeit all true) but it goes to show that I was (and still am) in no way ready to take care of anything, much less have a relationship or a baby. I cannot fathom how some of my friends are at a completely different time in their life where they are actually ready and responsible enough to handle things on their own.

I still call my mom to ask how to make rice. I still sleep past noon and skip class. I still accidentally cut the roots of a plant and expect it to continue to live.

Okay, so maybe I'm an idiot. Maybe I am totally not ready to be an adult or even ready to own anything remotely alive or have responsibility.

Here's hoping that I won't kill any more plants. And that once I hopefully do have a child, I will be ready and able to take care of it properly.

Popular Right Now

It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.

Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

SEE ALSO: 18 Signs You're A Little Too Comfortable With Your Best Friends

The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things You Say To Your Roommates Before Going Out

The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.

Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

There Is No 'Right Way' To React To A Shooting

Everyone is different.


After the shootings this year in New Zealand, Brazil, and close to home for some of us Aurora, people have been reacting in different ways. With some offering their thoughts and prayers, donating money to help pay for the funerals of the victims, fighting for action in regards to ending gun violence, candlelight vigils basically anything that can help them in this time of grief.

There is no right or wrong way to react to a shooting — everyone grieves in their own ways. We should not judge one another for how we grieve in a tragedy.

People have been saying that thoughts and prayers won't do anything. However, maybe it can be a comfort to some people—a way to let people know that they are thinking of them and that they care.

Sometimes people may want to donate money or blood to help out any survivors who may have suffered from blood loss or create GoFundMe accounts to either help out with medical expenses or to pay for the funerals of the victims or even start charities like Islamic Relief USA. Donating your time and money is a good way to help out because you are making a difference that is a form of action you are taking.

There is also grieving in the form of vigils. One example of a vigil is this guy who makes crosses every time there is some kind of tragedy. Vigils are often a good way to remember the victims, to pray for the healing of the survivors, to talk about what they were like as people.

Some people even want to take action by demanding that the laws change a good example of this would be March for Our Lives, which happened after the Parkland shooting last year. This march was fighting for gun control or should I say changes in the gun laws America currently has.

Some people also do acts of solidarity, for example, wearing a hijab like the prime minister of New Zealand did when she went to go visit the Christchurch shooting survivors. My community college had something a couple of years ago called Hijab Day to help show solidarity with our friends. I participated, and it was quite an experience—no one should ever be afraid to be who they are.

There is never a right or wrong way to react, and no one should ever criticize one another for how they react. It's not a test where there is a right or wrong answer—everyone is different and that is okay.

No one should ever have to be afraid to go to school, go to work, or go to their place of worship or wherever they decide to go. Whatever we decide to do to make a change, as long as we are taking some kind of action, is good enough for me.

Nothing ever gets done by sitting around and doing nothing, so whatever it is you do, get out there and do it. As long as you are showing support it doesn't matter how you show it.

Related Content

Facebook Comments