I Asked People If You Should Ever Give Second Chances
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1. "I give second chances to my girl best friends because they are my ride-or-dies. Friends can last a lifetime but boys come and go, which is why they usually don't get a second chance. If there was a break up, they need to take time to heal and build themselves up on their own. You need to see change and effort from them to fix what was broken if you broke up. It has to be a long enough time - a year two years, before they get another chance. Did they go to rehab, or therapy, or get a new hobby? Are they creating stuff, or building things? They need to have something that they're doing to change their mindset and that's the basis of a second chance. You can't give second chances carelessly, you need to see progress. Then you need to remember that there's some people that just don't change."
-- Female 20

2. "Whether or not you give second chances depends on the situation. In some matters you can in some matters you cannot."

-- Female, 46


3. "I don't give second chances. Sometimes people think that I'm really cold-blooded because of this. I actually believe that a person can change. They may not repeat the same mistake, they may get better than before because they feel sorry. But at that point my emotions are more important, and I can never be at peace with the person anymore. I would always be suspicious of them and mistrust them. I think the relationship is not meaningful if there's no trust between two people. That's why I really don't like to give second chances."

-- Male, 23


4. "It depends."

-- Female, 23


5. "That's such a big question if it's a behavior you have discussed with that person, and they have acknowledged the behavior, and they are committed to changing it, then sure, give a second chance. Our first impressions aren't always correct and our impressions of others have more to do with ourselves than with them. On the flip side of that, sometimes when people show you who they are you have to believe them. If it's someone you live with and you give them a second chance you also have to be sure they're making that change. Sometimes you have to be empathetic to people. They may be doing something because of something they're going through, and you're the one who needs to step up and change. Sometimes people aren't in a position to give you what you need, and you need to do something for them. Of course, value your needs, but you also have to recognize people are flawed and have their own things to deal with. When it comes to abusive situations you have to be careful, sometimes they could be using second chances to manipulate you. There's no hard and fast rule really. Everyone's situation is different. Just make sure you don't constantly try to make excuses for them either. "

-- Female, 26


6. "Yes, because everybody makes mistakes."

-- Male, 56


As you can see, there are three opinions on whether or not to give second chances. The first stance is to never give second chances, the second is to always give a second chance, and the third option is that "it depends". How about you, do you give second chances? Maybe reading this changed your mind, or gave you a different lens to look through the next time you have to consider giving someone a second chance.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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