Too many times guys I've talked to have started a conversation by saying "hey" or "wyd." When I see a message notification like this, I immediately release a huge breath of air wishing another message would follow. I speak on behalf of all females that this is not how we initially want our conversation to start.
An open-ended question, a compliment, a funny gif, anything is better than those three letters. If you're wondering why it is taking so long for us to reply to this basic text message, here's what we are thinking.
If you text first, lead the conversation.
A simple 'hey' calls for the next respondent to take lead of the conversation. We're then forced to take up the slack you gave in the lame text message you sent.
It’s boring.
One word messages foster a boring conversation. With no emojis or gif to assist the message, it comes off as dull and uninterested. This leaves us wondering why you texted us in the first place.
‘WYD’ gives us anxiety.
Do you want to meet up? Are you planning something? Do I need to get dressed? Do you casually want to know what I'm up to? We don't know if it is a time to sound busy or sound like we are bored and just chilling. All these questions are running through our head and we don't know what to do.
Could you not think of anything better?
There are too many other ways to get to know me. Ask us a question about me or my day. We like to read paragraphs so upon sending 'hey' give us a truly thought out response.
You are wasting my time.
For the girls that don't like texting it's even worse. We already don't like texting, but now we have to figure out how to make the conversation you started more interesting, which takes time. Having to put work into a conversation you did not start is annoying.
It’s not personable.
We like to see you making an effort. Something as small as the way you text can make me add an emoji by your contact, or delete your contact all together. Show me that the way you text me is different from the way you text anybody else in your phone.
Are you this bland IRL?
Sending a lazy text makes us translate that into our perception of you as a person. Sending a plain 'hey' makes us view you as boring, unable to hold a conversation and possibly shy.
Is this a booty call?
Depending on the time of night a message like this has been sent, we can't help but to wonder if we are just another option for the night. It's not a good feeling and makes us feel like an object you text when you need something.
There is nothing wrong with using these two phrases, but please do not use them to start a conversation every time you want to talk to a girl. Nothing compares to talking to a guy you chat with easily, don't make it difficult by sending poorly thought out texts.
