How To Deal With All The Mean People You Meet In Life

How To Deal With All The Mean People You Meet In Life

“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” ― Michael J. Fox

Congratulations! You escaped the perils of high school including the scourge of “mean girls” and can finally be surrounded by like-minded, academically oriented adults in college. Well, surprise! Those “mean girls” didn’t change much since high school graduation. It can be very discouraging for the kind-hearted, smart, sensitive types that felt tortured by those “mean girls” in high school to find themselves stifled yet again by rude, insensitive, cruel, and snobbish “mean girls”. We obviously can’t hide from them forever or run home to the safety of our parents, so how do we cope with them?

One thing we can do is to take the proverbial high road. People who feel important by stepping on others clearly don’t deserve to see that they’ve hurt you. Don’t give them the satisfaction of seeing you cry nor letting them convince you that you are unlikeable or flawed. Keep your head up and go out there and find your peer group. I promise you that there are others like you who will appreciate you for who you are. I know it’s easier said than done, but if you surround yourself with people that you enjoy, your feelings of self-worth will grow and will serve as armor to protect you from the side glances, comments, and snickers from those “mean girls” that you face.

Secondly, stand firm in the knowledge of who you are. You are not less than any other person so don’t cower away when someone is being ugly to you. To clarify, this doesn’t mean confronting them or getting into a fight (verbal or physical). It does mean, however, make eye contact, keep your voice up, speak your mind, and don’t change who you are. These things show that you are confident in yourself and show that you are too mature to play childish games with these people. You won’t convince the “mean girl” that you are valuable and beautiful- and you’re not doing it for that reason, you’re doing it to remind yourself that you are valuable and beautiful.

Additionally, don’t perpetuate the anger and meanness. It doesn’t serve a positive purpose to disparage their character to others. That makes you guilty of doing the same things that they are doing. Let others in your peer group see such bullies for who they are. The ones that care for you will see it and will naturally distance themselves on their own accord. If you begin talking badly about people and spreading the negativity, the bullies won, they have changed you and taken your joy. Life is too short and too full of possibilities for us to choose anger and negativity as our legacy.

In essence, we can’t avoid the “mean girls” in our lives. They will be in high school, college, and work places. I wish there was a way to fix whatever happened in their lives to make them so cruel and I hope that one day, each of them can find peace and happiness. Until that day comes, we just have to remember that we can’t do anything about how people treat us, we can only do something about how we react to what others do.

Cover Image Credit: Vixen Varsity

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Finding Your Niche In College Starts With Finding You

Attempting to be someone you are not for the sake of having company only hurts you in the long run.


Transitioning to college is hard enough, but trying to find a place where you feel "at home" can make this time even more stressful. Here are some tips on how to find that place/group of people that make you feel like sunshine.

I have always felt a little out of place wherever I went, but it wasn't until college that I realized that this feeling was so special and more people should capitalize on their differences rather than conforming to a certain mold. Transitioning to college and finding your place among so many people can be very overwhelming. The added stress of attempting to be someone you aren't for the sake of having company adds a whole other layer to this problem. The easiest thing for me to do in any situation like this is trying to make the setting a little smaller. One of the most obvious ways to do this on a college campus is by getting involved!

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Once you have a set group of people that you find yourself spending time with, it is important to pay attention to the way you feel when you're around them. If you find yourself feeling bad about yourself or get the impression that you need to change something in order to "fit in," chances are the people you're around are not the best for you or your self-esteem. It is important to surround yourself with people who allow you to feel comfortable in your own skin. That being said, you also want people who encourage you to make good decisions and help you reach your goals. People who encourage toxic behavior in your life might be fun in the short term, but in the grand scheme of things, you need to be surrounded by people with your best interest in mind. Essentially, surrounding yourself with people who influence you to be your best self is one of the best decisions you can make short and long term.

The key to all of this is being conscious of your own feelings and needs. Pay attention to who reaches out to you to hang out. Notice the ones who pay attention to you as you speak when it feels like no one is listening. More than anything, be conscious of who you're with and where you're at when you experience moments of pure happiness. Life is too short to waste your precious time on people who don't build you up. Wouldn't you rather spend your time with more moments of pure joy than self-hate? Start living for you!

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