So, you're lonely. Welcome to the club! Now that you're part of the club, you should feel less lonely! But you probably won't. So, try doing what I do on those lonely days:

Step 1: Realize that you feel lonely

It's loneliness. Don't get carried away and start diagnosing yourself with major mental health disorders. Leave that to the professionals (see step 7). The last thing you need is unnecessary stress on top of loneliness.

Step 2: Really feel lonely

Don't brush it off. Become familiar with your loneliness. It's just loneliness. Know the signs: maybe you feel like your heart is in your throat or like you're doing everything all wrong or that you just don't have any friends. It's ok. You're just lonely. If you familiarize yourself with the feeling, you'll know that loneliness is all it is, and we can deal with loneliness. Whether you're an outgoing friend-seeker or a shy loner, if you want to stop being lonely there is a way!

Step 3: Realize that your loneliness isn't "special" or "unique"

This isn't to say that you aren't special. I'm sure you are special! But seriously, stop saying, "you just don't get it!" or "you could never understand because you always have [insert: boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/pet's name here]." Why would you tell someone that they "don't understand" when we're talking about being lonely? You're only isolating yourself more.

Here's the thing, I'm not you. So of course I'll never feel the same, exact strain of loneliness that you're feeling. But I'm here, aren't I? I'm making an effort, so help me see where you're coming from. And if you don't want my help or I can't help, stop and see Step 7.

Step 4: Stop comparing your problems to those of others

This is probably my biggest pet peeve in the whole entire world.

Imagine your problems as one, big puddle. Each drop of water in your puddle is an issue you have overcome or are currently facing. Now picture my problems as a puddle, comprised of my own raindrop-problems. Now put the puddles side by side. Let's say my puddle is bigger than yours.

Now, take two raindrops that are absolutely identical (let's call these raindrops Loneliness). Plop a drop into each puddle. The drop creates ripples in each puddle, but since your puddle is smaller, the ripples are big when they reach the edge of your puddle. Since my puddle is bigger, by the time the ripples reach the edge of my puddle they can hardly be seen or felt.

So maybe I see loneliness as a small issue in comparison to everything else I'm dealing with whereas for you, loneliness is rocking your world. Who am I to tell you to "get over it" or to "stop making a big deal out of it"? And who are you to tell yourself that your puddle of problems doesn't matter as much as mine just because my puddle is bigger than yours? If you're hurting, it's ok to make a big deal out of it, if it is a big deal to you. Your feelings are valid.

Step 5: Call a family member

For me, I call my mom. It's awesome because I can talk to her for just a short time if I feel lonely walking to class or longer if I feel lonely because I've been in my room all day doing work because April is the worst month ever. Just hearing her voice, even though she's hundreds of miles away, makes me feel un-lonely. Plus, I don't feel bad for complaining to my mom, like I would complaining to a friend. It might be a burden on her, but she's family. She signed up for this, and boy, am I happy she did!

Step 5 1/2: A good backup plan to a phone call is reading or Netflix

Some of the people I've been really close to have died in Grey's Anatomy or become frozen on page 51 of that book I just put down to write this article. There's no shame in it! Sometimes these distractions can make you feel better. Just realize that this is a band-aid on the issue, not a permanent fix.

**Note: If all of your friends are on Netflix shows or in books please see Step 7.

Step 6: Journal about your friends

It's not gossiping if you're only telling it to paper. Here you can be brutally honest in evaluating your friendships. For example, one of my entries would look like this:

Ken: We hang out once a week for lunch, talk about classes and family, and sometimes do homework together. He encourages me to go to the gym with him, he takes me to parties on weekends and introduces me to all of his fraternity brothers. We help each other with boy problems. He's a great wingman. We have helped each other through a lot over the past two years.

Barbie: We hang out every day, all day. We gossip about people at school while we skip class. She encourages me to go to parties, even if I have a really busy day the next day. Then she leaves me alone at these parties for hours. She is constantly asking me for help dealing with her boyfriend, her Malibu beach house and/or her private jet, but when it comes to my problems, she doesn't like to talk about them.

Here is a made-up example of what a friend journal could look like. As you can see, Ken is a pro-social, awesome BFF! Keep him around! Barbie, on the other hand, is actually lending to your loneliness, making you reliant on her for social engagement and encouraging you to make unhealthy choices. Cut Barbie out!

Step 7: Ask for help

Just complaining about life to your friends or family isn't always enough. If you feel so lonely and you feel like no one can help you, you're wrong. Be explicit and seek out the proper resources. "I feel lonely all the time and I don't know how to change that." No problem! Everyone needs help sometimes. Here on campus, the proper resource would be University Counseling Center in Reynolda Hall.

Now, this isn't to say you're crazy. Sometimes the quickest way to get un-lonely is to go to someone who is paid to be there. No shame in starting small! Plus, they'll definitely have better advice than this article!

^University Counseling Center in Reynolda Hall^