Becoming an actor- let alone an actor who can support him/herself financially- is no easy feat. It can take years to get your first break and even then that might not be enough to keep the roles coming and retain a steady income. But have no fear! I have for you twelve reliable tips that have been proven to keep actors from drowning in bills in this brutal, competitive field. This is all you need to know if you want to become a working actor and survive!

1. Don't.


2. Don't become a working actor.


3. Seriously, are you kidding me?


4. That is the worst possible profession to pursue.


5. I did not raise you to make such irrational life choices.


6. When I said you could do anything you set your mind to, I didn't think you'd actually take it to heart.


7. You could be a chef, for god's sake, I don't care!


8. Actually yeah become a chef. That's kinda like theatre.


9. You always liked playing with the Easy Bake Oven.


9. You remember the Easy Bake Oven, don't you, Brendan?

10. Cooking is just like playing with that!

11. I'm not saying don't follow your dreams.


11. In fact, I'm saying follow the dream I'm forcing upon you.

12. Become a chef.