The thing about anxiety is that there are different levels. People are at different stages in their lives and not one person's anxiety is the same but the way I see it is there are levels. Think about it in the numbers one through five.

1. Doubt

You're not sure anything you do is right, you're always looking over your shoulder for someone to tell you that every single thing you do, every choice you make is the wrong one. And there is no way to turn it off. You are always at a one, there is no zero.

2. Overthinking

Because of all the ways you don't believe in yourself or believing others don't believe in you, you start to overthink your choices. You go over each decision a million times each, calculating the outcomes over and over and over - and still it's not enough. You wonder if what you are doing is the right thing and then start to second guess yourself painstakingly over each one. Once you are at a two, it's hard to go back to a one.

3. Embarrassment

Everything you do is now the wrong answer and you are in constant anguish over it. You feel like everyone is making fun of you because of that answer, even if it's a small one and suddenly every stare pointed your way is one of shame and criticism. You can't shake the feeling. Everyone knows what you did and now you're exposed, you're open and you can't close back up.

4. Guilt

The weight of the disapproval is heavy. Your chest hurts from the burden like it's trying to fight it's way out but its stuck because you made it stuck there and now it lives there. Its home is in you. It starts to eat at you, piece by piece and that guilt of keeping the guilt is too heavy to fight because you put it there. You begin to think it deserves to live there after a while.

5. Depression

You're weary from the load you now carry in you and you accept it. It starts to pull you down and once you were above the water, floating, but all of a sudden you're sinking into the trenches and you watch life around you go by like a movie. It doesn't bother you because what's the point? To try is difficult, your arms are sluggish and you can't pull yourself up - you just fall deeper into the water, into the blackness until you can't see anything anymore.

I've been through all five stages and they are all extreme in their own way and fighting them is different each and every time. Sometimes I jump from one to four or just straight to five. Sometimes I'm stuck at a two for days or even weeks at a time then I'll be at a three for a few mins before moving down the levels. Anxiety shouldn't be something people are afraid to talk about as it feeds into the levels and you can't stop yourself from moving from a one to five. I struggle almost every day with my levels and sometimes there is a sliver of happiness with no levels lurking in the background to ruin it and those are the good days because there are good days. Don't let the bad days outweigh the good ones. Go through the levels if you need to but don't feel suppressed to letting others know which level you are on because more than likely they are on that level or passed it and can help.