Not that long ago, I read an Odyssey article entitled "The Hopeless Romantics Aren't Cute, They're Abusive," and so much was running through my head when I started reading that article. I was pretty hesitant to make a response to the article not only because this is a year-old article and it would be a little bit pointless, but also because I kind of see where they are coming from. I have been on the receiving end for unwanted advances quite a lot throughout my life, but my way of showing love is not only by hugs and kisses but by being a bit extra.

I always believed in putting in the effort to show someone that I love them and for a lot of people (myself included), they tend to put a lot more work than they need to show their love. Plus, hopeless romantics are considered to be dreamers and hold sentimental views on love. They dream about how amazing love is and would like to give others the same experience on love. Obviously, I'm not saying that anyone is obligated to reciprocate their love to someone, but calling this effort "abusive" is a little bit of a stretch.

We do live in a hookup culture, so this type of love and romantic gestures are pretty rare today. Many people consider it to be "old school" and because of our evolving culture, many of these old school gestures are considered to be abused today. There is a lot that I understand why they are considered abusive, but for one reason or another, this is one I don't understand. I have been raised to believe that acts of love that put more effort into them are what you should appreciate in a romantic relationship and I try my hardest to give that same effort into those relationships.

I understand that for a lot of people, this is not something that they are necessarily a fan of and would prefer to have something else in a romantic relationship. I completely understand that. Everyone wants different things when they are in a romantic relationship and that should not be dismissed. I'm not saying that you absolutely have to reciprocate those feelings and accept their love if you don't want to or you're not interested in them. All I'm saying is that considering these gestures abusive can be treading the wrong territory.

Are there some cases where it can be abusive? Yeah, sometimes; if the person on the giving end doesn't get the hint the first one or two times. This is the case for any kind of romantic gesture. If they continue after being told they're not interested, it's abuse and I see where that's coming from. But calling every hopeless romantic gesture abusive is stretching it a little too far and is not fair to the hopeless romantics that are not abusive (myself included). Just remember that everyone expresses love differently.