I know this is hard, you were once the star of the show and had everything going for you. College has humbled you into a state that you might not have wanted to go to. It was nice to be the center of all that attention, you were the one that everyone talked about. As you left the kingdom of high school you fell into the pool of the athletes who are in fact just as good as you, if not better. You might not have expected it, but this is the reality you now face. Out of the 2% of high school athletes that receive a scholarship to an NCAA school, you probably weren't one of them. Truthfully it is ok and it does not mean you are less of an athlete then them.
Your school newspaper or athletic headlines might not ever read your name. There is this moment where you sink into disparity and realize that you may never play competitive sports after college is done and over with. You were given four years to better yourself and now it feels like you have let down everyone around. Well no you didn't, your mind is lying to you. If you did everything in your power to stay in shape, work on your technique, and take every chance to play your sport then you did not let anyone down. Sometimes we must give up things in order to find out what we can gain.
Why have you set such a high standard for yourself?
I am going to be honest with you, I of all people should not ask that question. Like most I am probably the hardest person on myself. I am my biggest critic and nothing no one says ever changes my mind. I expect perfection of myself and in sports there is no such thing as perfect, you can always get better in some area. You may not get to see the field, court, track, etc. as much as you would have liked when you first entered college. College athletics is competitive and it is mainly about winning and if you cannot help contribute then your coach won't put you in, your parents can't call up your coach and fight for you. It is up to you if you are willing to put in the work.
Your worth is not determined by your ability to play sports!
I know it has probably been apart of your identity your whole life. Being in the spotlight is amazing, of course you want everyone to know your name. Also remember that you are in college to get an education for the future. It is hard to sometimes put aside a sport you have beloved since childhood. I might have to do that and I can tell you it will be one of the hardest decisions I will have to make.
Even though it would seem that you are an average player in college and to you it might not be good enough. But there is still something that you need to be proud of. Out of the thousands of high school athletes you were chosen to play a college sport. You made it! That childhood dream of getting a varsity jacket and then going off to college and playing a sport came true! Not many people make it to where you are. So congratulations you are still allowed to be proud of yourself and your accomplishments. Being in the spotlight isn't everything, you are still playing a sport in college. This is no easy task.
Stop being so hard on yourself and just enjoy the time you get to compete and wear your school's jersey with pride. You didn't have to pay for your gear, you got that for free. You are more on the team than those people who sit in the stands and cheer you on, be proud of yourself for you have worked hard. You won't always be the best everywhere you go and that doesn't mean you need to shy away and feel bad for yourself. Go out there and try your best and leave it all on the field, that's when you know you've made it.