As a girl, if I got a quarter every time I have been told to “cover up” or “act more like a lady” I’d be rich.
I would definitely be richer than the people who told me that, but I would also be richer than the people who live their whole lives sexualizing women. I’m talking about the Carls Jr. Ad, countdown until a girl is 18 and legal, American Apparel type people.
According to society, I am only supposed to be sexual if I am I am advertising something, hyping up a musicians music video, or entertaining them. Take the lovely ladies who pose for Sports Illustrated either nude or practically there, but when a woman decides to post a provocative photo for themselves then they are considered slutty. It seems to be as if society is telling girls that as long as you are selling something its ok to be sexual but if it's just for you then that is inappropriate. Not even celebrities like Blake Lively and Kim Kardashian could post provocative photos without receiving backlash about being overly sexual or "sluts". It is as if our sexuality only exists for other people, and if we try to embrace it then we are doing something wrong, something ungodly, something unladylike.
Well, guess what society, you are hurting girls with your hypocrisy. You are belittling us by using our bodies but telling us we can’t take control of them ourselves. So I wanted to clear a couple of things up for you society, since you seem so invested in my body and me.
Stop sexualizing me. Ever. Only I can sexualize myself.
My body is not here for your sake. It is not an advertising tool, it is not something to entertain you, and it is definitely not something that you own. In fact, the only person who is in charge of my body is me. Do not try and tell me that I need to “show more skin” or that I need to “be more modest” with how I dress or act or dance or do my makeup. What I wear is not an invitation for anything. Ever. Your polo and khaki combo is not an invitation for me to harass you, so why is my crop top or short skirt an invitation for you to harass me? I am not dressed this way for you, so stop trying to think you have any right to my body.
I am allowed to be as sexual or as not sexual as I want to be. Period.
Do not ask me for nudes and then tell me not to talk about people I’ve had sex with. Do not tell my friends that they are “way too old to be virgins” and yet call girls sluts for having sex with several people. Whether I or any girl is super sexual or not at all, it is no one's business but their own. If I want to talk about my sex life then that is up to me, but you are not allowed to bring it up. Don’t try to tell me to be more sexy to get a man or less slutty to get a boyfriend because guess what, I am doing what I do for me not for anyone else. My sexuality is completely my own, so stop trying to change me and make me someone I am not.
So please society, listen to this and change what you are doing or please start giving me those quarters. Preferably the former, because I much rather be respected and treated like a human being with rights than be rich. Either way I am still going to be me.