Purdue,

I am quite upset with you; do you know that? From the very beginning, you deprived me. You deprived me of making my own decision. You accepted me as soon as you got the chance, while your rival, IU, deferred me. You saw I was capable, bright, driven, and talented. It baffled me that IU could question all of that. In my heart, I knew I could move mountains if given the opportunity but I also knew it was my extremely average SAT score IU was hung up on, but not you. No, you saw right through the shallowness of such judgment and instead, you chose to see me.

I had been falling for IU and your immediate affection took me away from that. You openly showed me the recognition I deserved, the kind of recognition I wouldn’t receive from them. Eventually, IU slowly caught on (no surprise there) and accepted me in March, but by then you already had me engulfed in you. I found myself supporting you just as equally and I found myself falling for you.

Now, as a second-year student with 81 percent of my degree already complete, I can sincerely say that you will cause me so much heartache. It’s upsetting because IU wouldn’t do what you plan do to me. I know IU wouldn’t have given me the deep connections you have. IU would send me off after a long four years and I would be obliviously happy to leave, like entering the world blindfolded. Unfortunately, when I graduate from you, I realize that will not be the case. My eyes will be wide open, and I will not be happy. I will feel cheated of my time because it will have gone by so quickly.

In the blink of an eye I will graduate from you and while you push to send me off, I will feel so incredibly aware of how ready I am to get a job and to start a family and to create the success I have always imagined for myself. I will feel painfully aware of how much I don’t want to leave you. Regardless of how much I will resist, you will continue to move me forward as you always have, encouraging me to take the next step. And maybe I will take the next step, but it is true that you will not make me feel how IU would have made me feel. If I had committed to IU there would be no tearing apart, merely a simple separation, like retrieving a pebble from a puddle rather than a boulder from an ocean. I hope you can sleep at night knowing that.

I can see it now: a gown hanging from my body, an awkward hat positioned just so on my head, my throat constricted, stomach in knots…all because you will send my absolute best friends to law school, med school, and other dream jobs that will feel like galaxies away from the job you’ll be sending me to, I am sure. You gave my friends and I the space to grow together, learn together, and become inseparable. And then what? You are going to take all of that away, just like that.

IU wouldn’t do that. IU wouldn’t have given me the chance to create something that could be torn, wouldn’t have led me to my best friends, or pushed me to Do Good through Greek life, or grant me the opportunities to get as involved as I am here. Purdue, you are a breakup waiting to happen. Everyday is one day closer to you breaking it off with me and the cozy life you’ve given me.

In the real world, I won’t be surrounded by 40,000 stellar people. I’ll be with everyone, people who won’t always understand that Harry’s Chocolate Shop doesn’t sell chocolate, or that running through a fountain doesn’t make you insane. I’ll be around people who won’t always bleed black and gold. They might bleed crimson…cringe. But see! That’s what I mean! This is why I am mad at you. I could be bleeding crimson right now. Sure it wouldn’t be anything special and I would blend in with everyone else, but at least I wouldn’t already feel the pain I’ll have when it comes time for us to part.

So in short, yes. You suck. You suck for giving me everything I could’ve hoped for from a college and more, knowing that one day you’d send me off with nothing but memories. Memories I’ll cherish forever.

Sincerely,

Your Student