Midterms came and went. And well, look at that, we survived. Good grades or not, the world didn't end when you got that grade back.

I know you have to remind yourself of this often. It's not that you don't already know it, but it's that you don't feel the truth behind it when you're staring face to face with anything less than you thought you deserved. It's not at all a bad grade, it's just not the grade you'd normally receive and you feel discouraged. You can't talk about it with your friends because they would kill to have THAT grade. So you keep it to yourself and go through the stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Except, you're stuck in the depression stage and haven't quite moved on yet, right?

You're not alone.

Somewhere there's an English major who received a low B on a paper and now, she questions her ability to write. A Communication major receives anything less than perfect on a speech for public speaking and immediately, they question their communication competence.

Why do we do this?

Some of us don't even realize why we want an A so badly, but we know we want it. It's because, from the time we were sent off to school, we've been trained by those letters. The letters had defined our success and failures since elementary school. The letters told us what we were good at and what we needed to improve on. We let our good grades define who we are not realizing that we've allowed our teachers to have that much power over our lives. I'm not saying let's get rid of the grading system or anything, but it's time to remind ourselves that grades are assigned to our papers and tests, not who we are as a person. We're all perfectionists who strive to be exceptional in what we're best at, but we can't keep living like this.

For one, our bosses are going to hate us. They're going to start to hate us for constantly knocking on their door like it's office hours and keep asking for help on fixing a few problems. We're supposed to be those problem solvers we told them we were in the interview. Also, our bosses aren't grading us or handing out A's, but we still have to learn how to take their constructive criticism without it affecting our self-esteem.

Another reason is that it's plain unhealthy to be consumed by our grades. It's great to be motivated and work hard to receive that grade! But if you get a grade that's anything less than perfect, don't let it destroy you. When you let it define you, you give your teachers the power to tell you who you will be and they should never have that power. Whether you receive a 92% or 93%, you are you. And you are worth way more than that.

This week, I'm facing six papers when I'm only enrolled in four courses. I had to take a step back today and get some perspective. No matter how well I do, I will never measure up to the pressure that I put on myself. It's time to take back the power that grades have stolen from our lives.

Give yourself a break and get some sleep.

Remind yourself that you're not perfect and you make mistakes, but it doesn't mean you're not good enough.

Extend your break from your lounging in your dorm room to a day out exploring the town.

One "bad" grade does not mean that the English major can't write and it doesn't mean that Communication major is incompetent. One grade does not mean you're not intelligent or creative. It does not mean who you will be tomorrow. It just means we continue to work hard.

Don't worry, you'll survive this.