Ladies, we have been brainwashed. All our lives we are raised supporting the Freudian theory of reaction formation. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Sure, you do. We were all in elementary school once and at some point during our primary school years a boy was probably mean to us. As you were sitting on the playground swing crying your first, of many, tears over a stupid boy, someone probably said, “Oh, honey, he was just teasing you because he probably likes you.”

Behaviourally, this is a pretty sound observation. In elementary school, it is outside of the social norm for a little boy to like a little girl. At this stage in life, kids tease each other if they venture outside of their strict social constructs so, perhaps, in order to avoid this, a little boy will prove his loyalty to the elementary school culture by ostracizing a little girl that he may like. But our continuous reinforcement of this theory has had detrimental effects on the modern dating world. Let’s be honest, dating sucks for a multitude of reasons but, recently, it has become so unbearable that many of us have just given up. The way that boys act nowadays has left me feeling, quite frankly, a little hopeless. There is very little in the way of chivalry or even manners and, ladies, I hate to say it but it’s partly our fault.

Since we have this mindset of, “He’s just treating me like poop because he actually likes me,” we’ve begun to accept this mistreatment as the norm and our male counterparts have taken full advantage. They realize that we will fully chase after them even if they only give us the bare minimum of affection because WE DO IT. Well, I think it is time to change our mindsets. Girls, a boy is not treating you like doo-doo because he likes you; he’s treating you that way because he’s a jerk. Drop that boy and move on because you have plenty to offer the guy who knows how to treat you with respect. Don’t accept mistreatment and constant heartbreak from a guy who just sees you as convenient. You’re not convenient, you’re a gift, a blessing, a goddess and should be treated as such.

If he doesn’t see you that way, then he’s not the right guy and, let's be real, those boys are a dime a dozen, girl, so take your pick. Be confident in yourself and let the fishes come to you. Let’s put an end to this stupid reaction formation idea in our dating lives because although it may apply to children in primary school, we’re adults now. Don’t let these boys get away with walking all over you anymore; accept only the best because that is what you deserve. If you don’t find it right away, be patient; it will be worth the wait.