You may think of self-care as using bath-bombs, face masks, or going on a shopping spree. That is part of it, but self-care includes what we do on a regular basis that keeps us at our best. And these can be little things too, like showering at a certain time of the day, because that is your time. Most of the time you can slap on deodorant and dry shampoo and walk out the door. But taking a shower and washing your hair every single day can make you feel one hundred percent. Sometimes you still feel gross if you don’t wash your hair in the shower, I feel that way too.

When you suddenly stop doing those daily self-care acts that work best for you, you’re not going to feel great. For me, my regular self-care act is going to dance. I’ve gotten in the habit of going a few times a week. It’s what keeps me in shape, and in the best mindset. So we can also define self-care as the things we enjoy in our weekly routine. The things that get us by, that is what self-care truly is.

Recently, I stopped going to dance class for three weeks. It was finals week, and I was packing for a three-week trip. My body was exhausted, so I thought it was a good idea to take a small vacation from dance. I was so wrong. I became depressed, anxious, and even more tired than before. Ironically, the last class I had made me feel insanely good. I even went to the gym the second I woke up on a Saturday, which was my only day off. So you would think that would inspire me to stay on top of my dance schedule, right? That is what I should’ve done. Three weeks is a very long time.

But don’t worry, I finally went to class today, and I’m feeling normal again. I did a little window shopping after class, and felt really good in the things I tried on. I bet if I didn’t went to class, and tried on the same things I probably would’ve hated what I saw in the mirror. And I most definitely would not have gotten frozen yogurt after, I probably would not have been hungry. Here’s the thing, I have gotten so used to dancing on a regular basis that I forget the way it affects me. It’s like taking your vitamins every day. If I forget to take my probiotics for a few days, my stomach will hurt.

My point is that self-care is not just restricted to luxury, and things that give you pleasure or instant gratification. It also includes things that keep you balanced in the middle. However, if Lush bath bombs are what keep you balanced everyday, find something else. Trust me, I’ve been there. Pampering yourself everyday is not living, it’s really only a distraction from the bad. Regular self-care acts are what ward off the inner demons. It’s like cleaning your kitchen countertops with Clorox. You need something that will actually do the job, not something light and pleasant.