"And what about you?"

"You've taken care of me far more times than I'll ever be able to repay you, Rea. You don't think I realize this?"

"It's not a competition."

"And that's exactly why I love you so much. Because taking care of each other is just natural. That's why we're still best friends, and always, always will be."

"How can you know that?"

"I can't. But I don't ever want a life that doesn't have you in it." Something in her voice makes me pull back to look at Tess. She's almost angry when she tells me, "I'm serious, Reagan. As long as we're both still breathing, don't ever leave me." She holds me with her stare, and I see that something has shifted inside of her. I'm torn between acknowledging this is because we'd been running for our lives, or recognizing that Tess was stronger, but she was still the most important person to me.

"Ok, Tess."

...

We go back to school a week after coming home. We've missed so much that technically, we should be expelled, or at the very least, redoing the entire year over when the following school year started. But considering "our circumstance" we're allowed to come back, though that first week we are kept in a classroom away from our peers "so we can focus on catching up without distractions." We aren't stupid, but we also don't care. If everyone thinks keeping the three of us secluded so that we spend 8 hours with just each other's company isn't fine with us, they're wrong. If they think this is the best way to ease us back in among our classmates, then we'll let them keep thinking that. If the only faces we ever saw again belonged only to me, Tess, or Travis, then so be it.

We don't care.

Two other faces hold their own places within my life. I can't speak for Tess or Travis, but I am haunted by one every night in my dreams. Ms. Perry is a steady, constant presence in our lives that I find doesn't bother me. But that other face, nameless, finds its way into my subconscious where I have no control over what happens. Every fear that I have control over in the daylight takes a life of its own during night. I have no desire to share this with Travis or Tess. We all agreed, silently and unanimously, we didn't need to see that fucker behind bars. That's where he belonged, not us. We belonged with each other, something that has only changed in the slightest.

We still spend every waking moment together. Tess has all but moved in, sharing my room with me like we're sisters. She goes home when her parents stop in briefly before taking off again. My parents are as oblivious as ever, but this all works for us. We're dealing how we want to, at our own pace, and their interference would only hold us back. We eat dinner with Travis and his parents as many times as we can manage throughout the week, and always on Monday nights. Mrs. Booth will send out a group text every Monday morning telling us how brave we are and that she loves us. It feels far from corny, and what I imagine is a mother's love. Then she'll ask one us what we want for dinner, each of us getting a turn to choose Monday night's meal. For once in our lives, Tess and I have a routine that resembles family. Tess has become especially close with Mr. Booth, something that Travis tells me is good for his dad.

"Before I was born, I had an older sister. My parents were really young when they had her. Like 19. She died when she was 10. She had a nut allergy that they thought she'd grown out of. She went about three years without any incidents, eating whatever she wanted. Then one day, she was eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich for lunch at school, and she went into anaphylaxis shock. No one could help her because she wasn't known for having any kind of food allergy."

Travis tells me all of this one late afternoon while driving me to work after I mention the friendship developing between the two.

"What was her name?"

"Zooey, like 'Franny and Zooey'."

I smile. "Tess loves that book. She has about 6 copies of it. If she sees a book she loves in an old bookstore, she has to buy it." I roll my eyes.

"My parents talk about her enough that I know who she is, but it's not something that comes up often. She and my dad were extremely close, and you can literally see the pain on his face when Zooey is mentioned."

"How long after did they have you?" We're in the parking lot of my work, and I swear it feels like this drive gets shorter each time, even though Travis takes the longest way possible.

"A year later. She'd be 27 now. I'll show you a picture of her later." I groan when he unlocks the doors, and he laughs at me before suddenly leaning over and kissing me.

We haven't done or said anything about that moment in the motel. That entire period of our lives is like a story we've been told so many that times that it feels like it could be our own. Except that it did belong to us, but we can't ever reach it, no matter how hard we try. Going back is not an option.

I didn't think Travis and I were an option anymore, but with his lips dancing against mine, I think I might be wrong. I refuse to be the first to pull away. This is just as intoxicating as the first time, and I when I push against his lips, Travis responds with his tongue. Time passes with no regard from either of us. We pull apart only to breathe and then realize where we are.

"Just drive somewhere."

I don't know where he's headed, but I'm sure Travis is taking the short way this time. Paul Simon sings to us about Julio, and by the time Travis pulls into a junkyard, a new song starts to play. Neither of us moves.

"Though it's only been a month or so

That old car's buggin' us to go

We've gotta get away and get back on the road again

Me and you and a dog named Boo

Travelin' and livin' off the land

Me and you and a dog named Boo

How I love being a free man."

Travis turns the music off when the song is over, and I just sit there, trying to figure out exactly how I feel. That song, that damn song, I played it on repeat when we were on our own. I drove Tess and Travis crazy with it, but I didn't care.

The first time I heard it after we got home, I took Tess' iPod and flushed it down the toilet before throwing everything I could get my hands on at something else. Tess has seen my anger, she's seen every side of me there is, but this well and truly scared her. I don't know when I ended up on the bathroom floor, surrounded by the mess, my anger coming out in painful sobs. Tess and one of the maids managed to get me into bed, and I slept for an entire day, that way you do when you are emotionally wrecked. Though we've never spoken about, I know Travis was let in on my meltdown.

It is silent for too long, long enough for the mood to shift. Here we are again, neither of us wanting to make the first move, except now the space between us has grown.

"I can't take the silence." Travis finally whispers, looking at me guiltily. I feel just as guilty for making him feel this way over a stupid song.

I take one of his hands in both of mine. "I'm sorry. It's fine, really." I can't look at him as I say this.

"I was going to delete the song, but I couldn't bring myself to. I know how much it hurts you to hear it, I get it, I do. But for me, it brings me back to a time I would give anything to do over."

I look to him; sure I'd heard him wrong. He looks right back into my eyes.

"I know we're all starting to adjust. Things are slowly getting better, but I still can't shake this feeling that it's never going to get any easier than this. That we're always going to carry this tragedy with us for the rest of our lives, always feeling like we need to be in hiding, and never feeling safe enough to settle down somewhere. Have a family. Have the love we both deserve."

Fuck. Travis lets me cry for about two seconds before pulling me to him.

"Reagan, that first day I saw you in school, I saw us. I still see us now. A year from now, five years. You're still there." He pushes my hair away and places a gentle kiss on my temple before whispering in my ear.

"I love you."

I stop. I stop crying, moving, breathing, thinking. Travis takes my face in his hands, gently guiding me to look at him. He does love me, I can see it all right there on his face. I smile and get one in return.

"Travis. I love you, too."

His smile grows wider, and finally, the space between us no longer exists. We fill all the parts of each other slowly, but our needs and impatience leave us satisfied in minutes.

"I'm not even embarrassed." Travis grins at me as he pulls his jeans back up. We've finally stepped outside the car, only because it's easier to put our clothes back on.

"Don't get used to that. Next time better be longer."

Travis doesn't have a chance to respond. I stop pulling at my shirt when I see his face, looking somewhere past my left shoulder.

"Reagan, run."

I do what he says. I don't look behind me or ask questions because I don't need to. I know exactly why Travis is throwing up as we crouch in between abandoned, junked cars. It's the same reason my vision keeps disappearing. Not that it matters because I can't see anything in the fucking dark. I stumble across gravel, panic rising as I become aware that I can't tell where any sound is coming from.

"Reagan!" Travis hisses from somewhere behind me. He grabs my shirt and hauls me backward, and for a brief moment, I am unsure who exactly has their hands on me.

"Don't move, Rea. Don't. Move." Travis whispers in my ear.

I am frozen. If he finds us, I'm dead. I can hear his grunts and shuffles, giving him away, though I still can't tell where exactly he is. I just know he's close. Travis grips me harder the closer he stumbles to us. It's hard to tell whether he's drunk, or just out of it. He sounds the same way he did that day in the confessional, crazy and not making any sense.

Except he wants to kill us. This, he is fully aware of. He wants us dead. We escaped once already; I knew he'd do anything to make sure that didn't happen again. Fear surrounds me as I realize we are playing a waiting game. We're waiting for him to find us, waiting for an escape, or waiting for someone to save us. My mind is quick to convince me that the first will be our fate. My grip on Travis loosens, and I'm only able to stay in the moment because he grips me tighter.

And then it hits me.

I pull out my phone and send a text to Tess, making sure my location can be found. Travis whispers in my ear as we wait out this un-fucking-believable scene. We can still hear him pacing and tripping, muttering to himself. I try focusing on Travis and his voice in my ear instead. I couldn't make out the words either voice made, but the one in my ear at least brings some comfort.

Stillness closes in when all movement abruptly stops around us.

A sound explodes like it's right on top of us.

The sirens pierce right through us.

We watch it all unfold before us.