He Didn't, But Someone Else Will

He Didn't, But Someone Else Will

I am accepting that my happy ending cannot be with him.
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I have an upsetting, maybe even embarrassing confession to make. I have spent the last two years running after a boy who isn’t interested.

Whenever I saw him, I hoped he would change his mind about me, and we could have the happily-ever-after relationship that I wanted us to have. But that never happened. It was nothing against him and nothing against me, it just didn’t happen.

Of course, I would move on for a little while, go on dates with other people, and even have feelings for other people. But, as soon as those feelings were over, my mind flooded with thoughts of him.

Whenever I saw him, I had these bittersweet feelings. When I was with him, I was overjoyed. But I knew as soon as we parted ways I would be upset. I knew that it was just one more time that I was falling for him, and he didn’t seem to notice.

Recently, I have decided to set myself free. I have decided to throw away all of those negative emotions associated with this relationship, and with him, and accept that things will never work out the way I wanted them too. That is just life, and it isn’t anyone’s fault. Just because I feel one way, doesn’t mean he does. I have learned that I cannot keep chasing someone who doesn’t want me that way. It is not fair to me, or to him.

Trust me, this has not been my favorite lesson to learn, but it was definitely an important one. It was hard for me to come to terms with all of this, and even with the fact that this could happen again someday with a different boy. I think next time I will be more prepared. I have slowly gotten over this boy and have realized that God meant for us to just be friends. Sometimes it hurt, but I believe that all things happen for a reason. I believe that there is someone out there who is perfect for me, that I haven’t even met yet. I also know that there is someone for him too, and unfortunately, it isn’t me.

With all of this being said, I know I can’t be the only one out there who feels worthless because of a failed relationship. I also know I can’t be the only one who feels unlovable because of one person who didn’t love them.

Ladies, I hope you know that you are not any less valuable just because one boy didn’t want to pursue you. I hope you know that just because he didn’t want you like you wanted him, someone else will.

So, don’t give up just yet. And remember that with every unrequited love, there may just be a valuable friendship to hold on to.

I definitely know that this can be a challenging thing to come to terms with, but I also know that the right person will come along, and it will be worth the wait.

Cover Image Credit: Playbuzz

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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I Promise, He Is Not The One That Got Away

You will never have to chase what is meant to stay.

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You miss him. You miss the hugs, the laughs, the inside jokes. You miss hearing his voice over phone calls, you miss the late night drives, you miss the fun adventures. You miss your best friend.

The guy that you loved so much, that you once planned a future with, that you haven't had to imagine life without in so long, is suddenly gone. No explanation will make it easier, or less confusing, or less unfair.

You're probably thinking that you'll never move on. You're thinking that this pain you're feeling will stay with you forever. You think that you lost the love of your life, because how could a bond so strong not be meant to last forever?

Leaving the familiar is terrifying. It is so easy to believe that this was the greatest love you will ever experience. You're afraid to leave behind the memories. You don't want to start over, because no relationship you have with anyone else will ever be the same. Nobody is him, and nobody will ever be him. Scary, isn't it? Actually, no. This is the greatest truth that you can admit to yourself right now. Nobody will ever be him.

He left. He hurt you. He made you feel unworthy. He did not choose to love you the way that you deserve. Yes, he did make you happy for a season of your life. This is a beautiful thing, and you shouldn't deny it. Just because he did not make you happy forever does not erase the time you spent together. Every relationship leaves behind memories, and these memories will always be pieces of your life. It is okay to think about them. You will be thankful for them one day.

Love is not always meant to last forever. Loving someone does not bind you to each other for eternity. It's unfair, and it feels impossible to let a love go. Especially when you were certain you would never have to. You fear that he was "the one that got away". I promise you, this is so far from true. "The one" would not leave. He would choose to love you even through the rough times, instead of walking away. Saying someone is "the one that got away" is a counterintuitive statement, and frankly it's a load of BS. Yeah, sure, he got away, but would "the one" really put you through endless amounts of pain and suffering? Or would "the one" treat you with respect and love you the way you deserve?

I've been in this same situation, fearing that my ex is the person that I am supposed to be with and that I let him get away. But truthfully, I didn't let him get away. He chose to leave all on his own. And that by itself should be a sign that he really is NOT "the one". If you have to chase and beg and bargain with someone for them to be in your life, odds are they're not meant to be there anyway.

It ended because better is out there. It ended because the relationship was no longer best for the both of you. It may feel like you lost the best thing in your life, but there is a reason for it. If something leaves, it means that that something is no longer supposed to be in your life. And that means that you will be better off without it. He is not "the one that got away", because "the one" would do everything in his power to stay.

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